Constipation

Discussion in 'Medical Advice' started by Nauseous, Nov 9, 2008.

  1. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

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    10,267
    No shit? That's remarkable. Do you have pics?
     
  2. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    I had a nice turd this morning and I wanted to take a picture of it. I was sad when I flushed it down the toilet. It was a "big girl" turd and I was proud. I'm going to tell my gastroenterologist about it today.
     
  3. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

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    2,169
    since we all sharing... I had diarrhea Friday, and shit in my pants as I left the grocery store. ( I was loading the groceries in the car) So I had to drive all the way home (about 15 min) with about 2 tablespoons of shit in my pants.

    Today I doodooed , and it was foamy... looked like chocolate froth... and floated. And for some reason smelled like dog doodoo.

    I wish I had a normal turd system.
     
  4. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    I'd say part of it is probably your nerves.

    Foamy, floating shit usually means you are not absorbing fat properly.

    I call it apple fritters shit. I've had shit that looks like apple fritters floating in oil.

     
  5. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

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    2,169
    good, I don't want to absorb fat.

    Back years ago a Doc gave me a small sample bottle of Xenycal (sp) anyway, it stopped fat absorption. It causes grease to leak out of your butt. I was sitting on the front porch stairs...and when I got up there was a puddle of oily poo. I never felt it, it just oozed out. I got the hose to rinse it... but it had soaked into the wood, and for over 6 months after that, when it would rain...it would bead up in that spot. It weather proofed that 6x9 inch spot.

    I never took it again, but my X husband tried it... and leaked greasy shit all over the sofa.

    and it took forever to wipe your ass... it was so oily. We even made jokes about needing some Dawn dish soap... to cut the grease.

    I gave the remaining pills to my friend...and she ruined her seats in her new car....was driving to work, and had to call in that day from the parking lot.

    Bad drug...
     
  6. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    That made me laugh. Especially about the weather proofing. I always thought smeg should be used as a car wax. Anyway... Do they still make those chips with that stuff... what was it called? Olestra? The bag warned you of anal leakage.

    I took Zelnorm before they yanked it off the market for causing strokes and it made me shit river water for two hours straight.
     
  7. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    Olean. That was the stuff they put in the chips and all.

    "Warning: May cause anal leakage"
     
  8. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olestra

    Same difference

    I used to eat those Lays Wow! I think that's what they were called and I didn't have any leakage. They were actually pretty good chips.
     
  9. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    This Product Contains Olestra. Olestra may cause abdominal cramping and loose stools. Olestra inhibits the absorption of some vitamins and other nutrients. Vitamins A, D, E, and K have been added.

    Damn, that's what Crohn's and Celiac Disease do.
     
  10. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

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    2,169
    I ate those chips... and trust me, It was nothing like the Xenical. I wish I could get some more of it... put it in people's food that piss me off. Watch them walk around with warm oily shit in their pants.
     
  11. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

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    10,267
    I tried those... they did give me the mad Hershey Squirts... But even living with that, I could never get over that strange oily film that it left in my upper mouth...

    Like I've always said, people... Eat real shit. Our bodies are honed to metabolize REAL butter, etc...
     
  12. MAJ Havoc

    MAJ Havoc Active Member

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    3,123
    You can buy Alli at Wal-Mart. Same thing. Wear dark clothes and an adult diaper. Or at least come buy my house and rub up on my fence if you use it. It could stand some weather-proofing.
     
  13. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    Some fat free stuff isn't bad. Cool Whip is good fat free and there is some kind of yogurt I ate that is fat free and good.

    I think calories are what you want to watch out for.

    I've been eating pumpkin pie everyday and everyday my stool has been decent, so I am going to eat pumpkin pie everyday for the rest of my life. That and these probiotics I am taking. My stomach still bothers me, but I'm functioning better. Of course, I'll be sick now that I wrote all of that.
     
  14. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    Yeah, today I feel like crap. So much for that theory.
     
  15. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

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    2,169
    I dont think anyone should eat the same thing for a few days. A few months ago I got on a clementine (sp) kick - those little oranges .... That was all I ate for 3 days- I ate a whole box from Sam's Club by myself, then went to buy another- and finished 1/2 of that box. I got the quirts and my butthole was on fire, and I felt like crap. Damn those little things are good.
     
  16. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    Maybe you shouldnt eat the peels.
     
  17. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    That's pure acid. Oranges rip me up.
     
  18. beauzho

    beauzho New Member

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    1
    Ho mu-thu-fuk-u

    We all be dick heads on this bus
     

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