Creeper Theater Since you guys gave me a million responses to how to fix that door, I think I'll bregail you with another work story of yore. We have this employee at the theater, names Heather and she's one of those retards that you can't really tell is a retard until you hear the retarded shit she retardedly says. Her job there is pretty much rip tickets, allienate everyone into doing work if she starts talking to you. Examples of pissing me off/boarder line harassing the popcorn jockeys is. 1. "Yeah my aunt died the other day." She looks up with a wide smile to me, "Who in your family died recently?" Says this in a chipper voice, like she's happy of the conversation. 2. As I'm managing the ushers, she says she needs to take a break when she's guarding an R rated movie. I say she can't because she is only working for 4 hours. I walk away and she complains to the head manager that she needs a break, and gets one. I notice the door is unguarded, and likely all manner of teenagers sneaking into the theater. I go and find her, following the ushers and eating popcorn. I ask her why she took a break, she didn't need one. She replies, shit you not, "Well...time's change." This situation alone had me convert to euthenasia. 3. "Yeah, I've had bad direhea all day." Not to me, but apparently she said this to an employee that was eating. 4. She follows me to lunch (FUCK), and then at the table asks if she will ever become a manager. I say flat out, "Not a chance." she then says, "I'll show you." In this playful retarded tone. I brought it up to my main manager and she busts out laughing. 5. She has a short conversation with a customer about his shirt, apparently a hotel she was at in Las Vegas. Apparently this is the most conversation she has ever had and on her break she goes to their film and sits next to them, talking about Las Vegas. The customer comes out and demands a refund after a while. We give him one and half afraid Heather will follow him to his car. So now that you know she is a complete piece of work and I'm not just hating on the handicapped, I can get on with the story. We had a customer walk in with his two kids and buy tickets for some kids movie, I forget which, and he says to me "There is a creepy ass guy out there...I don't want him around when I come back." I nod and think the guy is just a creepy looking guy and the guy is a bit of a dick. This turns out to be false, as the guy is apparently talking to every customer that walks in. We do the only proper thing and call the police since they are less then a block away. To my horror, the guy comes in and starts to talk to me, and the customers in line. Holy shit is he creepy, he had this habit of smiling at little kids that sort of made you sick to your stomach. The cop finally comes and sees him, walking over as he is sort of a nervous wreak, saying he didn't do anything and what not. To my surprise, Heather sees him and rushes over, telling the cop that he was just going to see a movie with her. Wait...wait a second. Was this creepy ass guy her Boyfriend or Brother? I don't want to ask and have them ramble to me so I just give them their tickets. He stops, looks up to me and breathes in heavily, "Most beautiful woman in the world right here...right here man..." He said patting at her shoulder. I don't say anything and Heather seems to be a bit quiet about it, not even smiling to it. So he was her boyfriend. Joyous DAY! She knows the pain she pushes on us. A good two weeks later he comes in again with her, he is his typical talk to everyone self and he walks to the concession stand. I over hear him talking about how she is so beautiful and such, things like that. She is just ignoring it and I'm having a field day of redemption. After they leave I bring it up and the one employee just looks at me. I say that's her boyfriend and he just shakes his head. "I have her friended on Facebook..." He tells me, something I routinely deny her (she keeps sending me friend request though like I misclicked) and he says that he is her brother. Wait wait wait...what the fuck is this shit!? But yeah he's laughing as he brings up Facebook on his phone and shows me that they share the same last name. So she is constantly harassed by her brother that finds her sexually attractive and creeps the shit out of other people. Is this revenge or something...karma? If anything, I find it hard to laugh at it anymore seeing as he turned from a creeper boyfriend to a creeper incestual brother. Seeing as they are both mentally handicapped, it leads me to believe it runs in the family.
Simple solution. Trap the two of them in a theater alone, spike the popcorn with PCP, and lock them in the empty room while playing the shittiest movie you can think of. Maybe Gigli. Or anything by Michael Moore.
