The first time i encountered retards was when i met my grandmother's new neighbours,when i was 4.Both parents were fucking weird/mad psychiatric nurses,and both their children (a girl called Angela and her younger brother) were retarded.Both Angela and her mum wore retarded looking thick rimmed NHS glasses,and both had curly black hair.When it dawned on me (helped by my brother shouting 'Ugh yuch-don't play with her!!!) that Angela was not going to be very interesting company,and unable to play games,i tried to alleviate my boredom by desperately trying to trick her into eating earthworms by pretending i was doing it,nodding heartily and gesturing to her to do the same.Much to my annoyance,the useless bitch wouldn't fall for it shaking her head distressedly and saying 'UGHHHHHHHHH.....UGHHHHHHHHHH' Another time,i scraatched her arm to alleviate my boredom,her dad suddenly appeared and she ran to him saying 'UGHHHHHHHHHH UGHHHHHHHHHH' and pointing at me as i sat stroking a cat ,fortunately her weird/stupid/mad father (or possibly he approved of my abuse of her) said 'Ohhhh dear,did the cat scratch your arm then?(about very uncat-like looking scratches)-while she still pointed at me and frustratedly grunted 'UGHHHHHH!!!!UGHHHHHH!!!'..I felt sooo smugly relieved! [imghttp://www.fugly.com/ubb/icons/icon7.gif][/img].Seeing Angela who was 5/6 being forced into a nappy and the way the tard parents seemed to work their tard children into distressed fits got too disturbing and i stopped going to visit. Anyone got any more interesting retard tales they'd like to share? Rev??You ever trick any fat retard girls to come and eat your worm?Anyone? P.S.Emmm...not suggesting anything about Cheezedawg,by context in which i've used this. Really.:
i remember a kid called nick at my school, he was always selfish, arrogant and loud. when he didnt get what he wanted he used to burst into a red-faced shouting fit interwoven with 'uggghs' and 'aaargghs'
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nursey: Anyone got any more interesting retard tales they'd like to share? Rev??You ever trick any fat retard girls to come and eat your worm? Anyone? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I recall one chick in 7th-8th grade, she would stand in the hallway by herself and have conversations with herself. It was quite hillarious, especially when she'd tell herself jokes she hadn't heard before. Les'see... then there was this one ree-ree I used to work with because my employer thought it'd look good to the community by hiring a couple of the local retards (How do you think I got the job?) Anyway, you can tell when a retard has a thing for ya, they get this look in their lazy eyes and the drooling becomes more uniform about the chin. She kept trying to get me to come to this 'party' that she was having on halloween because her parents were gone. Don't worry, I knew it'd be futile to sow my immaculate and superior seed on tainted earth, and I avoided her like the plague. Next up, we have the brother of example #1, someone that either never fucking showered or fell into the Gorge of Eternal Stench upon conception. Why their parents were allowed to procreate is beyond me. And of course, who could forget the local retard that made a paltry $2.40 an hour cleaning tables at the pizza joint, and on the odd occasion (read: every time we were there), we'd pull the ol' place a napkin over a full glass of soda, place it upside down, and tear the napkin away trick...
Have ta say i class Ginger people as retards as they get treated the same... by me anyway. When I was a little kiddy, about 11/12, I used hang with a "crew" one of which was a ginger/retard named Tommy. With this crew I was a little shit... we broke into, addmittedly empty houses... ran away together and terrorised the little shits/retard kids that pissed on our territory (one time we stalked and beat up these little shits that decided to play in our fucking park!... they didn't bother comeing back... not on their own though... with their mums and dads ) Anyway... this kid called tom was a skinny fucking ginger head was very intelligent but lacked that thing most people need and that is common sense... he also wore Y-fronts. He managed to piss everyone off one day... can't remember exactly why... something to do with makeing little posters for his Blue peter sale thing...??? So... we were hanging at the park and he was going on about some retarded shit he had done when Dean (my then boyfriend) pissed in a empty bottle and chased after the twat, who rans like a pansy anyway and completely soaked the poor fucker. Me Louis and Dean pissedourseleves laughing while Tommy sat on the grass crying and screaming at us. He was so retarded though that he went home got changed (without haveing a shower dirty fucker) and came back out and was hanging with us within half an hour. There was also the retarded older kid that we used to hang around with. He had hardly no teeth and about a million piercings in one ear... no education but he hung around with the Gippos that we thought were cool coz they would let us sip (yuk... i cant beleive we did that... who knows what we caught) their 20/20 and smoke their fags. We called him Fug and tried to wind him up but he never took the bate... we thought he was mentally retarded but looking back it was prolly all the glue he sniffed. Speaking of glue... a few years later along came Gluey... The meaning behind his name was that he spread glue on a piece of toast and gave it too his babysitter once. Then when he got older he fried his brain sniffing so much of the shit. We had fun with him. We told the town psycho hard nut(who is extremly fit) that he had got some weed from one of our friends and not paid him (that was true but we were fucking little bastards and it wasnt necessary for him to get involved). This resulted in gluey being kicked a few times in the stomach after being made to cry infront of every sorry fucker in our small town who was out that Friday night. Ya should have seen the blubbering fool... The glue had affected his speech and had fucking made himself a retard. He slobbered like a dog and talked like one too. He is even worse now I have many tales of terrorising the young, deserving folk of my Town - population 1800. but... BUT Im feel a tear developing in my glazed eyes, just remember the memories of a happy powerful childhood that came to an abrupt end when we all discovered sex. (not all together mind... the nearest i got to sex with Dean was a kiss behind a fence... which, when word got around, turned into a full blown shag fest (that was due to the ginger retard who was told to stand guard ) fucking prick. It was cool though - evryone thought we had shagged... we were only about 12 The good ol' days
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by wank*: We called him Fug <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You say that like it's a bad thing...
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The Reverend Pearl Necklace: I recall one chick in 7th-8th grade, she would stand in the hallway by herself and have conversations with herself. It was quite hillarious, especially when she'd tell herself jokes she hadn't heard before. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> What's so strange about that?!!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nauseous: What's so strange about that?!! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Baaaaay-beeeee! Wasabi?
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The Reverend Pearl Necklace: <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> He had a Pugly look about him... I was gonna get a picture of that kid from the Bash Street Kids but can't find one anywhere. Sooo just go here... http://beanotown.com/index2.htm the kid second from left with yellow hat.
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nursey: P.S.Emmm...not suggesting anything about Cheezedawg,by context in which i've used this. Really.: <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I know yous wuznt harpin on da Prince Of Blackness. He stills gots much luv fo you, whitey.
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Cheezedawg the Insane: I know yous wuznt harpin on da Prince Of Blackness. He stills gots much luv fo you, whitey.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ~I luv you too you soulful,black,lean-mean hunk of licquorice pumpin' lady-stuffin' night-sky velveteen......consider this bitch vanilla dip to your cocoa-stick...but only if you make up with Cheeze!.............*shimmies off...looks back and winks*
I think the first retard I encountered was a downs syndrome spastic I met in a ball-pond when I was 6 or so. This daft fucker was throwing balls at everyone like everyone else was, except his lack of brains was countered with a lot of strength and the fucker was hurting me, so I bashed his head against the cage and held his head under the balls. I was promptly banned for life from the ball-pond and I'll neer forgive the retard for that.
The first retard I met was when I was 10 (that I knew for a fact was retarded). He was this unusually tall kid with a kind of ringo starr looking face, and would just laugh constantly. He apparently also discovered the word "Shit", for one day, I saw him in the woods, sitting on a bench, repeating it over and over...anyone who walked by him, he would just blurt out "Shit!...Shit shit!!!" I think his parents sent him away after that..
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nursey: ~I luv you too you soulful,black,lean-mean hunk of licquorice pumpin' lady-stuffin' night-sky velveteen......consider this bitch vanilla dip to your cocoa-stick...but only if you make up with Cheeze!.............*shimmies off...looks back and winks*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Shit!!! It didn't work!!!! Maybe white cheeze explained to black cheeze it was just psychoanalytical ploy to fuse Cheezedawg 'yin' and Cheezedawg 'yang' back together...and they compromised long enough to agree to stay insane...
