The desk... Oh, the horror...

I undertook a monumental task this evening, and that was cleaning my desk so I can use it to study for my final this week (I'm tired of studying on the Ms Pac).

I honestly have not seen the top of my desk in years.

Here's a list of some of the shit I found while digging my way to the surface of the desktop...

<UL TYPE=SQUARE><LI>some .38 bullets
<LI>half a roll of toilet paper
<LI>undeveloped rolls of film (these could be interesting)
<LI>candy
<LI>gum
<LI>a Buick hood ornament (from a car that T-boned my bud and I in his dad's brand new Chevy Silverado a few years back)
<LI>3/4 of a welding rod
<LI>a perfectly preserved skeleton of a lizard (except for the tail, which I found later)
<LI>bills
<LI>receipts dating back to 1996
<LI>two calendars, one from '96, one from '97
<LI>two cigars
<LI>a religious pamphlet
<LI>countless rubber bands that became brittle, sticky, and hard over the years
<LI>my dog's '98 rabies vaccination record
<LI>a coffee cup
<LI>a winning lotto ticket
<LI>some various OTC pills
<LI>a key to a Mercedes Benz
<LI>over $30 worth of 29 cent stamps
<LI>a bag of golf tees (I don't even play golf)
<LI>my long-lost portable color LCD television!
<LI>about 25 interesting coins (mostly silver US currency <= 1964, some foreign currency, & 3 1942 Nazi coins)
<LI>my childhood 'Masters of the Universe' glow-in-the-dark Burger King kid's meal toy
<LI>letters from past girlfriends
<LI>letters to past girlfriends
<LI>3 restaurant gift certificates (with no expiration date - bonus!)
<LI>a 20-ga syringe needle
<LI>my 80's Def Lepard "Rock of Ages" hologram hat pin
<LI>countless phone numbers scribbled on scraps of paper
<LI>three condoms (a true testament as to how old some of this shit is, second only to the stamps)
<LI>and enough dust to make a throw-pillow.
[/list]

I'm fucking exhausted. The whole process took about 4 hours. Lomo gonna go beddy-bye now.

 

fuck me lomo is your desk part of the TARDIS??

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote

Tommy I think he's been sitting under the desk for years, hence the assorted gubbins piling up B]above[/B him... an explanation there possibly?[

 

ooof! shagged me bold lettering up there big time...

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dubya's Shit Pit:
ooof! shagged me bold lettering up there big time...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I might be wrong on this one, but didn't Martin re-instate the edit function...?

 

No Fred you're right. I'm a doofus.

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by tommy710:
fuck me lomo is your desk part of the TARDIS??<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Fuckin'-A. A Doctor Who reference. An old Sci-Fi show filmed on one sound stage and in a quarry for over 25 years. With 15 episodes, it matched "Who's Line Is It Anyway?" and "I Claudius" for the longest running shows in BBC television history.

Now we're just waiting for the Hollywood remake because no one can think of anything original any more.

 

i can even remember what tardis stands for as im such a boring sad low life trainspotting dick with no freinds but before i do is there any other dicks out there that know too so i know i aint the bottom of the ladder??

 

Time And Relative Dimensions In Space

Don't ask how the fuck I knew that it was just one of them things that sticks from when I was a wee boy...

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dubya's Shit Pit:
Tommy I think he's been sitting under the desk for years, hence the assorted gubbins piling up above him... an explanation there possibly?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Not exactly... there was just as much shit under the desk, too... It was just easier to relocate that to another area than examine it with the same attention to detail as during the surface excavation...

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Antichrist Lomotil:
3/4 of a welding rod<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

is it caked with brown on one end?

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Goddess Yummy:
is it caked with brown on one end?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No, I cleaned it after you gave it back...

 

so you mean the one person i have the most in common with is dubya???jesus christ well done guys i think you just got me to leave

 

but then again maybe not

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Antichrist Lomotil:
I undertook a monumental task this evening...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Damn man!

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Antichrist Lomotil:
No, I cleaned it after you gave it back...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

must have borrowed it in my Fag Hag days

Sunday nights were me, 4 fags, Queer as Folk, Heiniken, and good times.

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote

Sounds like some sort of Indiana Jones adventure brewing here...

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by tommy710:
so you mean the one person i have the most in common with is dubya???<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

i knew it too.. dr who rocked

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Antichrist Lomotil:
<UL TYPE=SQUARE><LI>undeveloped rolls of film (these could be interesting)[/list]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

maybe we'll see some tornados

 

dubya AND pimp NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO