These lyrics are from a song by The Dead Milkmen. It's from the album, Big Lizard In My Backyard. You have to actually HEAR this song to appreciate it. Takin' Retards To The Zoo It's a boring day I've got nothing to do Except to get a load of retards and drive em to the zoo Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo Load em on a bus just for laughs Down a winding road stepping on the gas Down a winding road just daydreaming Down a winding road with the retards screaming Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo One of them blowing a big spit bubble Slam on the brakes at the first sign of trouble Head on collision bodies everywhere Head on collision retards beware Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo Oh oh oh takin' retards to the zoo
it was a beach party Vietnam, rostin weenies with napalm, surfin wihthe viet cong, beach party vietnam
Good call Nauseous! I am partial to this one... I'm gonna beat my wife I'm gonna beat my wife now Gonna smack her with a lead pipe Gonna smack her with a 2x4 Run her over with a Brink's truck Chase her down with a lawn mower Gonna beat my wife Look out! Wife beatin' Mistreatin' Wife slappin' It happens ** keep in mind this song is done in a James Brownesque style**
Here's another good one. Bleach Boys I've got some buddies and we all drink bleach You know we practice what we preach We're not a drunken bunch of frat-boys Trashed on beers Or a stoned bunch of hippies With no careers I wanna drink bleach with a Georgia peach My pals and I all drink Clorox Or eat Snowy Bleach right out of the box Teenage suicide rate's shot high And we understand the reasons why Bleach does more than whitens socks Don't you wanna hang out with the Bleach Boys, baby? In a world where ministers murder golf pros Don't you wanna drink some bleach tonight? Maybe there'll be a party at the beach We'll bitch about life and chugalug bleach No one's getting high, and no one's getting drunk I've got a case of bleach stashed in my trunk I wanna die with Clorox within reach I'm very proud of the respect I've earned And my voice is very deep cause my throat got burned Bleach keeps you young so I've been told Cause no one who drinks it lives to get old Drink it with a chaser was the first thing that I learned Don't you wanna hang out with the Bleach Boys baby? In a world where midgets run for mayor Don't you wanna drink some bleach tonight? I had 26 friends in the beginning But now it seems our numbers are thinning Some people drive fast, others love to bet Still others snort coke in a private jet But drinking bleach is my way of winning Don't you wanna hang out with the Bleach Boys baby? In a world where welders own our schools Don't you wanna drink some bleach tonight? I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I'm so bored I'm drinking bleach I am so bored! I am so bored!
We could go on for days... there are SO many!! Here's another one... Sri Lanka Sex Hotel Let's have sex with strangers in the men's room We could do it and not get caught Burn down the house where the metal kids live All the Hendrix posters going up in flames Let's have sex without birth control Sell our offspring to some dirty old man Let's play Big Black at 3 AM And tell the neighbors they can all get fucked Commin' over the first hill I felt my body jerk The attendant did not strap me in I'm sure that I am gonna die This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last ride Down the street there's an accident I hear that the bodies can still be seen Let's call the sheriff a cock-sucker See if he's read "The Killer Inside Me" Let's have sex with pit bulls Maybe pollute their blood line Little Timmy's in the sandbox At the daycare center run by ex-cons Commin' over the first hill I felt my body jerk The attendant did not strap me in I see the loop is up ahead This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last ride Let's burn it down and knock it over Let's have sex with it or leave it alone 3-D Jesus by my bedside Talks to me when it's late at night I thought I left you in Sri Lanka Working the desk at the Sex Hotel For Christ's sake why isn't Bob Hope dead yet? Commin' over the first hill I felt my body jerk The attendant did not strap me in I feel the track below my feet This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last roller coaster ride This is my last ride
I know. The Dead Milkmen kick ass! Here's another favorite. I love this fucking song! Methodist Coloring Book You've got a Methodist Coloring Book and you color really well But don't color outside the lines or God will send you to Hell 'Cause God hates war and God hates crime But He really hates people who color outside the lines You've got a Methodist Coloring Book don't color outside the lines 'Cause if God doesn't strike you with lightning He'll at least make you go blind Good people get sent to the attic Bad people will roast in the cellar But there's a special kind of Hell For those who just won't learn to color God is gracious, God is good Let us color in his book God wears cotton, God wears rayon He can mend a broken crayon God is honest, He don't take payola Let's all thank him for our Crayolas You've got a Methodist Coloring Book... You've got a Methodist Coloring Book and you color really well But don't color outside the lines or God will send you to Hell
This one brings back a lot of old memories for me... Punk Rock Girl One Saturday I took a walk to Zipperhead I met a girl there And she almost knocked me dead Punk rock girl please look at me Punk rock girl what do you see? Let's travel round the world Just you and me punk rock girl I tapped her on the shoulder And said do you have a beau? She looked at me and smiled And said she did not know Punk rock girl give me a chance Punk rock girl let's go slamdance We'll dress like Minnie Pearl Just you and me punk rock girl We went to the Phillie Pizza Company And ordered some hot tea The waitress said "Well no We only have it iced" So we jumped up on the table And shouted "anarchy" And someone played a Beach Boys song On the jukebox It was "California Dreamin'" So we started screamin' "On such a winter's day" She took me to her parents For a Sunday meal Her father took one look at me And he began to squeal Punk rock girl it makes no sense Punk rock girl your dad is the Vice President Rich as the Duke of Earl Yeah you're for me punk rock girl We went to a shopping mall And laughed at all the shoppers And security guards trailed us To a record shop We asked for Mojo Nixon They said "He don't work here" We said "If you don't got Mojo Nixon Then your store could use some fixin'" We got into a car Away we started rollin I said "How much you pay for this?" She said "Nothing man, it's stolen" Punk rock girl you look so cool Punk rock girl let's have a child We'll name her Minnie Pearl Just you and me Eat fudge banana swirl Just you and me We'll travel round the world Just you and me punk rock girl
Someone stop me!!! If You Love Somebody Set Them on Fire You know that it would be untrue You know that I would be a liar If I were to say to you I didn't set your house on fire But it's just the way I am You'll have to take it for a fact Life can really burn you up When you're a pyromaniac If you love somebody better set them on fire I went to your house last night Your dad called me the human torch Got a little pissed at him So I burned down your front porch Now I feel a little bad About throwing gas on your dad But you know it's hard to quit And besides he started it I just bought a brand new lighter And I just can't wait to use it With a can of kerosene it's lots of fun You can't refuse it Oily rags are special things You know to me they're diamond rings Maybe we can have some fun Maybe we can burn someone If you love somebody better set them on fire If you love somebody why not set them on fire You know that it would be untrue You know that I would be a liar If I were to say to you I didn't set your dad on fire If you love somebody better set them on fire If you love somebody why not set them on fire If you love somebody better set them on fire If you love somebody why not set them on fire
