So I'm having the weirdest conversation ever.

Now I been chatting online with random people for a long time. I've heard everything you can think of from drug problems to Baby daddy problems. Rape stories blah blah blah.

Well I'm sitting here today and fired up Yahoo. Started talking to one of my friends in Japan. When I get a random message from some chic. I say hi or whatever thinking it's a bot.

Well she's not. She's some black chic from the same town I am. She keeps asking me things and telling me other things. Then she steers the conversation to sex. I humor her figuring I would freak her out by saying I want to ram her in the ass with the biggest spiked butt plug I could find.

When she asks me "have I ever paid for sex" Which totally caught me off guard. So now I'm in a conversation with a hooker. Who says she is not a hooker. She just feels if a man is getting his she should get something for her time. After all they are paying for the time and not the sex.

So I humor her, and ask how much she charges. Knowing most escorts or whatever have a set price. Well she says it depends on what the guy wants. So I say how about a little anal with ass to mouth.

She says she is not a hooker again and doesn't do anal, But she charges 200 for a hand job so imagine what a blow job costs.

2 bills for a hand job that better be the best hand job I ever had ever. I'm still humoring her to find out how a hookers mind works.

 

i am so glad I dont use yahoo messenger. When I first got on the internet I had to use AOL, cause they were the only provider with 'local' numbers. I have never been so inundated with messages of 'hey where you at in augusta?' or 'hey do you know me'. What a bunch of retards. I mean here I was doing COBOL programming on a telnet connection to an AS400 and I get that crap? Ha ha ha. Not to mention all the times AOL would drop in a given hour.

 

It's probably Chris Hansen's new show. You better be careful.

 

I have no clue but I'm laghing my ass off. Cause she keeps saying if your in a relationship you don't charge. That sometimes it catches guys off guard when she ask for money after.

Ya think? lol I mean hey baby that was great and she is like that will be 1500 dollars ha ha.

 

hehe, switch it round, tell her your a psychiatrist and your charging for her therapy.

 

I just asked her how much it would be to remove her clit and fry it up in some butter. She hasn't wrote back.

 

You know black chics don't even like to hear about a guy going down. Do black men chew there pussy like Big League chew or something?

It's almost like it scares them lol. Ain't no money in the world let me let anyone eat my puddy..... Yeah!

 

I heard a black comedianne say you can't get a black man to lick a stamp.

 

I can't get a decent handjob from my wife. I keep stepping in like Nick Burns-your company's computer guy, and going, "Move! Now, was that so difficult?" But it's not her fault, I've been at it longer than she.

Still, $200 is pretty steep for a happy ending. Didn't Hugh Grant get a BJ for $50?

 

I won't say how I got the best BJ ever from my wife this weekend lol

 

Why didn't you tell me you had a GHB hookup?

Oh, and where I work, usually the hookers start to come out in droves towards the end of the month, when the bills are due... I still can't imagine paying for sex, though. I don't even like to go to the titty bars to pay for blueballs...

 

I hear ya. If I want to see a naked chick who won't have sex with me, I just watch my wife get out of the shower.

 

Never truer words spoken

 

She thought you were somebody else?