Come on tart we wanna here bout your christmas...rest of us retards had boring family get togethers where as u n pimp actually had fun..now help us get over the festive period with tales of sex,drug and pain.
they had a great christmas..just like me.. anyone who has a member of the opposite sex to fondle is surely gonna have a great christmas..
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Disorder: they had a great christmas..just like me.. anyone who has a member of the opposite sex to fondle is surely gonna have a great christmas..<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ...or in my case, a bottle of lotion and a 4-hour porno...
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The Reverend Pearl Necklace: ...or in my case, a bottle of lotion ..<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> not trying to tan your dick are you ?? trust me.. you end up looking like a sperm.. a big white blob with a tiny black dot..
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Disorder: not trying to tan your dick are you ?? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> no, he's masturbating.. .. surely you haven't forgotten it already?
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Poisonous Pimp: no, he's masturbating.. .. surely you haven't forgotten it already?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> surrre. i can remember how to wank.. i just havent needed it.. and anyway, its a style thing: He uses lotion, which may(or may not) disappear, requiring more.. i use oil which keeps a longer shine/smoothness and thus not needing a 're-squirt' for a longer period of time.. unless of course he uses 'oily lotion' in which case he would get the 'friction reducing'/'well cared for' cock combo..
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by GratuitousAssSlapper: I'd just go with the good old KY myself. Not that I need to masturbate or anything... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> LABELED: Chronic Masturbater
Well,at about 5 pm on New Years Eve,it dawned on me i needed to start getting ready.i dyed my hair,and gave Pimp a haircut at the same time,went for a bath,went to a friends house to collect the dress i was to wear that night,snorting a few big lines of coke just to accelerrate my already hyper-state of metabolism,went home,started blabbering semi-nonsensically to Psycho Bob on the phone while i was trying to do my makeup,went out to a friends pubs 'lock-in' party,took 2 e's...waited,took 2 more,then another 2 (i had 8 by theend of the night) and then just as i started coming up and 'shakin that ass...shakin that ass' started to play,it was apparent the time had come to go and transform into my New Year Nursey outfit. I have acquired 1 As i was leaving, retreating backwards and waving to all my adoring hordes while some french rap song played,there were cries of 'Nazi Nursey!!!Nooo!!!You can't goooooo!!!!Nazi Nursey!!!Nazi Nursey!!!NOOOOOOO!!! and kisses being planted ~in~ my mouth.Then me and Pimp got home and fucked for 24 hours (on and off,of course-what do you take me for?Sex Goddess?Correct,but even I like coital breaks to roll joints,take refreshments and look at the forum from time to time!)
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The Reverend Pearl Necklace: ...or in my case, a bottle of lotion and a 4-hour porno... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by GratuitousAssSlapper: I'd just go with the good old KY myself. Not that I need to masturbate or anything... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PinkorBrown69: So you had nearly as much fun as me then eh? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I just want to say... help is at hand My friend posted some threads when he was in the grips of Thread (1) Thread (2) Inpiring words
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by unlimited-time: Wow you really are a slut.I bow down to your slutiness. Glad you had such a good time .<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Thankyou.You weren't in Edinburgh at the time,were you,UT? Just,I saw a fat shaggy-haired bespectacled blonde dykey woman pressing her podgey face and fat white fuck-sacky tits against the window of the place i was in.She had some flashing...deely-boppers...i think they might be called-the type that all the council-estate type morons all wear at New Year. You were dementedly peering in and dribbling red vomit onto your voluminous,floaty,turquoise nylon party dress and your puffy black leather jacket,and mouthing something that might have been 'Nursey...I can lick til the cows cum home...' I found it a little distracting as i was sitting with a little group of adoring awestruck males all vying for my attention,and ordered someone to close the curtains.
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nursey: Well,at about 5 pm on New Years Eve,it dawned on me i needed to start getting ready.i dyed my hair,and gave Pimp a haircut at the same time,went for a bath,went to a friends house to collect the dress i was to wear that night,snorting a few big lines of coke just to accelerrate my already hyper-state of metabolism,went home,started blabbering semi-nonsensically to Psycho Bob on the phone while i was trying to do my makeup,went out to a friends pubs 'lock-in' party,took 2 e's...waited,took 2 more,then another 2 (i had 8 by theend of the night) and then just as i started coming up and 'shakin that ass...shakin that ass' started to play,it was apparent the time had come to go and transform into my New Year Nursey outfit. I have acquired 1 As i was leaving, retreating backwards and waving to all my adoring hordes while some french rap song played,there were cries of 'Nazi Nursey!!!Nooo!!!You can't goooooo!!!!Nazi Nursey!!!Nazi Nursey!!!NOOOOOOO!!! and kisses being planted ~in~ my mouth.Then me and Pimp got home and fucked for 24 hours (on and off,of course-what do you take me for?Sex Goddess?Correct,but even I like coital breaks to roll joints,take refreshments and look at the forum from time to time!)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Wow you really are a slut.I bow down to your slutiness. Glad you had such a good time .
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by unlimited-time: I was I did I am <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Awwwwww deeeear*tut* ...and I didn't realise it was you! And to think that all that time i heard screams of 'NURSEY!!!NURSEY!!!SAVE ME...PLEASE!!! as the bouncers brutally assaulted you in the nearby alley with their cattle-prods i could have simply broken off from my delightful little self-adulatory discourse for a moment,stepped outside and uttered the words "leave the gibbering,fat-uddered,speccy-slut alone,boys,she's a fan of mine",all your suffering would have come to an immediate and abrupt halt...never mind.
