Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis by Eric Schwartz Keep your Jesus off my penis, Keep your Bible off my balls, Keep your prayers from out my ears And your crosses off my walls! You can keep the Virgin Mother, And the resurrection too! Keep your Jesus off my penis, I’ll keep my penis offa you! Well I’m freakin sick and tired Of turning on the news And seeing the religious right’s Ungodly fight To take our right to choose. When to bear our children, Who to love and how, Education and protection If we’re just practicing for now! So W, look, obey a book If that’s what works for you; But I don’t tell you how to pray, So don’t you tell me how to screw! [chorus - Keep your Jesus off my penis…] So you’re screaming bloody murder About the Taliban regime Subjugatin women, And being too extreme; And basing legislation On some ancient holy book. Does that sound a bit familiar? Here’s a mirror, have a look! And as for the ten commandments, They need one more at least: “Thou shalt never cover up The acts of pervert priests!” Now how can they let that happen, Unless they just abhor us? Well, anyway, it adds Another layer to the chorus! [chorus - Keep your Jesus off my penis…] So you’ll execute a person, And protect a single cell; But mercy-kill the terminally ill And you’re going straight to hell! Well, I don’t know much about The word of God, Far be it from me, But I can tell you what it ain’t: HYPOCHRISTIANITY! Now I am not anti-Christian, Before you grab a rope. There’s beauty in religion And joy and love and hope, And we’re all looking for the answers To the collossal cosmic cause, But who the fuck are you To turn your views into my laws!?! It’s just believers in the bible That would have abortion banned. Anti-choice agnostics, I can count ‘em on one hand! [holds middle finger up] And as for killin’ babies, I have but one retort: If someone raped your daughter, George, you’d beg her to abort. And if some young girl from your church Shows up childless from some infection, You taught her what a horrid sin it was To use protection! Well some day you’ll face the pearly gates, And whatcha gonna say, When that long-haired Jewish peacenick Sends your ass the other way!? Keep your Jesus off my penis, Keep your Bible off my balls, Keep your prayers from out my ears And your crosses off my walls! Look, I’ve had it up to here With all the Biblophile disputes!! So keep your Jesus off my penis, At least that’s what I would do! Keep your Jesus off my penis, I’ll keep my penis offa you!
Halalala, kill them all, in the name of allah we shall whipe them all out, don't preach to me white man, you're leaders start wars for illegitimate reasons and then you don't give a damn because you still got beer and chips, Halalala, That's all I've translated so far. You know it just doesn't sound right when you go from one language to another.
During a parliamentary debate about legalising the abortion drug RU486 here in Oz, a Greens senator wore the following T-shirt (attacking the current Health Minister, Tony Abbott):
Idf it aint Arabic it sure is vampiric, but what about the foetus ? Ha felmegyek Kolozsvבra Egyenest a fellegvבrba Ott lבtok sok urat lni Akikkel fogok ott lakni S rבm is nyomtak egy pבr יvet Szabadulnיk de nem lehet S irtam haza az anyבmnak Kldjצn pבrnבt rablבnyבnak S'el is jצtt az יdesanyבm Sirva-riva borult reבm Sirhatsz anyבm jaj szףval is Egy lבnyod volt rab lett az is By the time I get to Kolozsvבr They'll be waiting in the station Securitate officers with AK infatuation Black Dacias in the car park like skeletons in the woodshed All you get for Christmas is a bullet in the head Vatra Romaneasca has a war made just for you Magyar v Romanian and there's nothing left to do But get down to the town square It's not that far a drive It's Saturday night in Kozsvבr town And no one leaves alive Hogyha meg talבlok halni Ki fog engem elsiratni Elsirat az יdesanyבm Aki gondot viselt reבm Don't stare at me you mascalzones I recognise your faces We ain't going out on our knees We're going out like Szיkis A public execution, the whole neighborhood can watch I don't care, I'll buck ya down, it goes Ne nיzz reבm ne ne ne Mert nem vבgyok a fene Nem akarlak megenni Csak a szemed kivenni
