No never doesn't happen even if they happen to be ugly you still think about fucking them. It's just the way men are wired.
I think I could be friends with one depending on how the relationship ended. Of course, it would be just one more of the female friends I'd want to sleep with. I am wired that way.
Sure it's possible but usually its just the case of one or the other being manipulative keeping things going to some degree to get what they want and not what they do not want. As for sex or no sex. Hell I think the harder question is can just friends have sex without changing the dynamics of the relationship. Just seems like every otherwise friendly chick I have sex with is there after all over me. 8)
The fuckbuddie ah .... whats the word? Catch 22 maybe? If the sex is really good and enjoyable for both parties then something inevitably comes of it. If it’s great for one and only so so for the other. Then one becomes infatuated and the other has no interest. Unless of course the one with bad sex performance has something else to bring to the table. Then we are back to the oldest profession. I guess if two people actually hated each other and only got together for a good grudge fuck. :wink:
Heh its over rated really try being married for better than 15 years. All sex becomes a grudge fuck with all the guilty feelings of self loathing. Because after it's all said and done damn it its not fair they get half the sex and all the money.
I dont think its possible, have to agree with Grim, we are not wired that way. Deep down all we want to do is get a 'shot o' leg'. I have been in the 'fuckbuddy' relationships, that I thought were perfect, do whatever I wanted, then at night ring-ring. Then I get the 'you only see me as a friend' speech. All the ones that were 'friends' I have ended up sleeping with, or nearly sleeping with, it just happens that way. The only guys that 'really' have girls as friends are Mo's. Unless the chick is fat and ugly, and even then most of us would let her go down on us..... :shock:
Unless you don't mind hearing about her current gentlemen suitors, dates, and advice on "why is [insert generic name here] doing that" then yes it is possible. If you think by being friends that you're going to get a second, or third chance to salvage your failed relationship, and you have placed that much value on your previous realtionship then give it a shot, but be honest with her about your intentions and feeling. it's a rock and hard place Lomo, I don't envy your posistion. To quote myself: "The problem I find with most people, is that they can't seperate out what they love, and is worth protecting, and what they deisre and wish to indulge in." Be absolutley sure which avenue you want to pursue Lomo.
Checkmate, that's the most sound advice I've heard in a long time. Really struck a chord. I was too pressed for time last night to reply, and tonight I'm too drunk to properly reply, but I'll at least make an effort. What you said concerning 'hearing about [x] guy' - that's the kinda shit I know would happen, and as of yet, it hasn't - maybe that's why I keep talking to her (or maybe that inherent desire to keep what we've worked on for 2 years). Being Bipolar, and going through one of her depressive states, I think that may have something to do with our recent breakup - it's happened before, but never to this magnitude (neither has her depression). I know deep inside that I don't need this kind of drama for the rest of my life, and I even recall thinking along those lines when we first got together - but I guess I let my defenses down and got too attached. Fuck it - I'm defeating the whole purpose of drinking by trying to remember the shit I wanted to type, so with that I bid you all a fondue.
Lomo, After reading your post above, take some time for youself, get yourself sorted out, empty the emotional closet, and start fresh. Make a point to create some new positive habits in your daily routine, plant a garden, get some moderate excercise (ride your bike, take a walk) try to do at least 30 to 60 minutes a day. Try to refrain from drinking, recreational drugs for a period of 30 days, I am not saying quit altogether, but taking a break will help get you focused. Before bedtime, try to take at least 15 minutes just to sit and meditate and think about the day, try to make sense of all the events that have transpired. If you're interested and you would like a little more indepth help, please feel free to hit me up on the ol MSN checkmate64@hotmail.com
Sounds like good advice from the "Cold Sober" side of Checkmate. I think I may try some of these methods myself though I'm not in the same situation. Of course, I may substitute "take a walk" with "take a wank" and "meditate" with "mastur....." oh, you get the point. Good luck, Lomo.
I really do need to do that... I need to do that, also. Last garden I had couldn't be kept outdoors, though... I used to grow peppers in the back yard, but the birds kept getting them. Funny, they'd take a bit of the habanero, decide they don't like it, and then the pepper would dry out prematurely. I honestly can't remember going 30 days without either. :s I'm sure 'refraining' for a month would put a great deal of things into perspective. This is all really sound advice - What the hell are you doing here at Fugly? added...
