I’ve got to quit drinking so damn much. Take last night’s 'epic' dream, for example... It starts out in a small town that I’ve visited in the past, and I find myself at a Subway sandwich shop. I’m standing in line, and all of a sudden, I notice the most horrific pain coming from my back… It was almost as if my flesh was being severed from my muscles and bone, and in several places. It wasn’t a constant pain, more like someone punching my back in different spots, and not long after the pain started, it would end and move to the next target on my back. This continued until I left the restaurant and made my way out into the street. There, on the street, I noticed other people running hysterically, screaming in agony. There didn’t seem to be a specific direction everyone was running, more like just random chaos. I could notice each person’s screams were perfectly in sync with a strange phenomenon. Right before a scream, I would see a person’s skin practically disappear, along with some muscle tissue – sometimes all the way down to the bone. It was almost like there was a subcutaneous M-16 firecracker blowing up inside of them, creating a 6-inch crater in its wake. Then, as if by magic, the strange phenomenon would regenerate the tissue as if nothing had happened… This whole process took less than a second, it seemed. I decided it’d be best to get the fuck away from whatever was causing this, so I hopped into my car and drove to the next town… When I got to the next town, I noticed that things were fairly normal… I stopped into a small general store, and started browsing around… I wasn’t in there but maybe ten minutes when the excruciating pain began again. I could feel my back being torn to shreds, and I ran for cover behind a candy display. By this time, I could hear frantic footsteps a few yards away from me, and I quickly honed in on where they were coming from… It was a kid, probably 12 years old, running around with what looked like one of those novelty laser pointers. Bastard hit me with it once more, and the same torture ensued. This time, the pain lasted longer than a second, and he held it on me for what seemed like hours, but in all actuality, was probably less than ten seconds. Afterwards, the little prick ran off out into the street to find his next victim. I noticed a small commotion near the shopkeeper’s counter, and I went over to see what was going on. Before me stood 3 kids, roughly the same age as the bastard that zapped me, holding out money for the eager shopkeeper. This was the motherfucker that was selling these little rayguns to the kids. What else could I do, but stand in line and buy my own? By the time I got up to the counter, there were only two colors of laser left, maroon and green. I figured it didn’t matter, and grabbed the maroon one. There seemed to be some sort of attachment to the thing that looked like it restricted the laser flow, and I promptly removed it and tested it on the shopkeeper. Poor guy. After liquidating him, I grabbed the rest of the laser things and went out into the street. By this time, the pandemonium seemed to have spread into this town as well, and I found myself not being targeted, as I suppose the kids noticed that I had them outgunned. No matter. I fried every last one of those little bastards, then I walked towards my car. As I was getting closer to the street corner, I could hear screaming behind me… Some gook was running towards me as if his back was on fire – and for all intents and purposes, it was. I was rather enjoying the spectacle, and as he ran past me, I caught a glimpse of the perpetrator – none other than a good buddy of mine, laughing his ass off as he ran to keep up with the screaming slant-eye. What happened afterwards is somewhat fuzzy, but I’ll try to recollect it as best as I can… I somehow found myself driving to this ancient house that seemed normal on the outside, but once I walked inside of it, I found myself crawling through a ground-level attic of sorts. I literally had to crawl on my chest to reach the living room, and once I got there, I noticed two people sitting in laz-y-boy recliners, their heads mere inches from the ceiling. I don’t know what conversation transpired, but I found myself crawling back to leave when this floating, transparent, female spirit started hovering above me… Turns out it was some horny she-demon, and she wanted cock bad. Thoughts ran through my mind as I tried to think of what would happen if I actually fucked this demon. She had some way of sensing what I was thinking about, and had a visual aid to enlighten me as to the repercussions of inter-spiritual coitus. I looked to my right, as I’m straddling this tangible ghost, and I see countless transparent demons levitating in a military troop formation… Even stranger still, they all had my face. Of course, this all was symbolic to me, and meant that my copulation with this demon meant the spawning of an evil demonic race of half-human, half-demon soldiers that would no doubt try and take over the world as we know it… It was a tough decision. So, I decide to go ahead and fuck her. I’m not even five minutes into it, and my goddamn alarm wakes me up.
Be thankful that alarm woke you up. The way Murphy's Law would have it, that cute she-devil would have suddenly transformed into a 500 pound black guy, and you would try running for your life...
i actually read your post in full, and i came to realize that a world full of she-demon/Lomo's wouldnt be half bad. if they would stay in their lazyboyz and eat gourmet chips whilst playing classic arcade games did you happen to watch Full Metal Jacket recently by any chance?
Not recently, I actually went a week without removing the disc from my CD case... I was thinking about it the other day, though - perhaps that had something to do with it, who knows?
