Fuck you.

Discussion in 'Jokes, Funny Stories and other Text.' started by Lomotil, Dec 13, 2003.

  1. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

    Messages:
    10,267
    I never post jokes, but I was sent one that I'd read ages before and it rekindled a murmur of laughter from the shallow depths of my cold, blackened heart...

    About 12 seconds into this you'll realize how stupid it is - and I could give less that a fuck... Where'd my fucking beer go, anyway?

    My Dearest Redneck Son,

    I'm writing this real slow, because I know you can't read fast.
    We don't live where we did when you left home. Your Dad read in the
    newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of your home,
    so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address because the last
    Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they
    moved so they wouldn't have to change their address.

    This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not
    sure it works so well, though. Last week I put a load of clothes in and
    pulled the chain. We haven't seen them since.

    The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the
    first time for three days, and the second time for four days.
    About that coat you wanted me to send; your Uncle Billy-Bob said it
    would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we
    had to cut them off. You can find them in the pockets.

    Bubba locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried
    because it took him two hours to get me and your Pa out.Your sister had
    a baby this morning, but I haven't found out what it is
    yet so I don't know if you are an aunt or uncle. It's the dangdest
    thing, but the baby looks just like your brother.

    Uncle Bobby-Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried
    to pull him out, but he fought them off and drowned.. We had him
    cremated; he burned for three days. Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pickup truck.
    Bubba wasdriving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other
    two friends, Cletus and Buford, were in the back. They drowned because
    they couldn't get the tailgate down.

    There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much out of the
    normal has happened.

    Your Favorite Aunt,

    Mom
     
  2. rossco27

    rossco27 New Member

    Messages:
    36
    hehehe ...


     
  3. Cough Syrup

    Cough Syrup New Member

    Messages:
    392
    Rossco, you don't HAVE to put emotes on every damn post
     
  4. rossco27

    rossco27 New Member

    Messages:
    36
    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Cough Syrup:
    Rossco, you don't HAVE to put emotes on every damn post <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    i`m sorry cough...does that piss you off?
     
  5. Cough Syrup

    Cough Syrup New Member

    Messages:
    392
    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dickco27:
    i`m sorry cough...does that piss you off? B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Look I too am clever
     
  6. rossco27

    rossco27 New Member

    Messages:
    36
     

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