Friends of the opposite sex

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by Nauseous, Jul 17, 2009.

  1. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    Why can't you have friends of the opposite sex when you are with someone? Why is it always such a big deal?

    Personally, I don't mind if the guy I am with hangs out with another female. No reason to get upset. If someone is going to cheat, they are going to cheat. Who cares? I mean, I used to care when I was younger but now, blah... I don't give a shit.

    Why is it that I get shit for just talking to someone? It's fucking gay and suffocating. I have normally had more male friends than female. With the exception of Bigmama (the coolest female I sorta know), girls make shitty friends.

    I have one friend in KY, that I feel bad about seeing so I can't when he is on town, another one that wanted to hang out but I didn't and now he lives in FL, and another that doesn't live that far away but I don't hang with him because I don't want to get shit. And I have another that's like 5 minutes away that I couldn't because, again, I would get shit and he has a girlfriend and I don't think she would be cool with it, which is retarded because I have known him for like 7 years and he was married to one of my good friends... I knew him first, she can go eat shit, so he's like 'come over, i'm having some friends over' and I'm like, 'fuck it. i'll get shit and i'm not going to be around people i don't know and feel awkward just so your girlfriend doesn't have a spaz fit" It's just not worth the effort. He's not that cool.

    So why is it? Are you guys like that? Do you know people like that? What ever happened to trust? And why would you be with someone you couldn't trust?
     
  2. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

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    8,426
    I don't understand it either I mean if you are married to someone then you should trust them or you should not be married to them.

    Of course there has got to be some sort of boundaries. If you wanted to hang out with Bigmomma's tard friends all the time one should be suspicious.
     
  3. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

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    2,169
    I have had the problem with friend's girlfriends not liking me... then they seem to realize I am OK after hanging out with me for a while.

    I remember a few years back I went out with my friend... then at like 4 am we were in an IHOP... and his girlfriend comes in causing a big scene. I felt embarrassed for her.
    I have been lucky with the past 2 men... they trusted me. Hell my first husband and I hung out many times with 2 of my Xes. I never felt worried about either of them because they are both sooo boring .. no one wants to hang out with them.
     
  4. Reizvolles

    Reizvolles Active Member

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    2,487
    If I was with a guy that wouldn't let me have other guy friends, I'd kick him to the curb. You don't need that shit.
     
  5. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

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    10,267
    Yeah, no kidding. You should be able to hang out with your less-than-complete-stranger fuck buddy in Texas.
     
  6. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    I got shit this weekend for texting my friend. Now he's talking about him all of the time.

    If he thinks I would try to trade him in on a guy with two kids, he's deranged. One kid is bad enough.

    No offense to those of you who have children (whoa a dry erase board just flew off of the wall, scary), I just never planned on being a step mother or a mother of any kind for that matter. If I gotta date again, the next guy will be childless.
     
  7. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    I think there is a fine line with opposite sex friends. A lot of times they are soundboards for you to bitch about your spouse/gf/bf and they 'understand' your dillema. 99.9999% of guys (straight) that hang out with a girl on a regular basis want to hit it. You might have guy friends that you are just friends with, and he might agree, but on the inside he's picturing you naked. I cant think of any girls that I was 'friends' with that I didnt sleep with. The only down side is when they get all clingy and say things like "you only see me as a friends", uh duh, that's what you said you wanted.

    Going to lunch with a coworker is one thing. Talking to them on the phone all the time, texting (a ridiculous number), meeting up with them without your spouses/gf/bf, those are things that can raise doubts.

    You have to put yourself in the other persons shoes. I dont think a text message is a big deal, well depending on what it said, if you typed 'purple headed meat hammer' in the text I could see where he could have had an issue... :)
     
  8. BigEddie

    BigEddie New Member

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    150
    Might just be my latin upbringing, but from what I observed when I was a kid, whenever we woudl go visit people, most of the time, the women would be one place and talk, and the guys would go like, outside in the backyard and crack open some beers and talk. If both sexes mingled it would be when everyone would be in the same area. Rarely do you have women talking to guys like that unless its like relatives or something, but yeah, I have a deep mistrust of any guy talking to my woman. My last two girlfriends were cool like that. I told them how I felt about it and they didnt care, they said they liked having female friends moreso than male, which was A ok by me.

    This one girl Im currently seeing is a bit like that, but I think with a little more time she will hopefully be like that too.
    But yeah, I get extremely jealous when I see a girl Im seeing hang a little too much time with other guys. Like I just want to kill the guys she's talking too if I feel I'm being ignored or something. Eh, but dont some girls like that? lol.

    Of course though, there is that double standard where I feel that its fine for me to talk to other women, and I know thats unfair, but hey, thats just me and if women that Im with dont seem to mind that then ok.
     
  9. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

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    8,426
    Haha Phats right if you are talking to a guy regularly then it crosses his mind on a regular basis your naked hot body against his with your nipples all erect.

    Or

    He really is gay. That's just how guys brains are wired.

    That being said I trust the one I'm with and expect the same in return. Talking to some guy from work or an old friend that is a guy from time to time does not bother me. A guy BFF and regular conversations all the time though would definitely be a different story.

    BTW when you gonna post a complete picture of yourself again ... You know not just a head shot?
     
  10. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    Yeah, he has no problem with my gay friend although he still makes comments about him too. He does it like he's being funny, but it's really just annoying.

    He has a gay friend and they hang out sometimes. To me, it's the same thing as him having a female friend.

    I give him a little shit for it, just because well, it's gay. :)

    What are you requesting full body shots now?
     
  11. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    That's gay, he just wants to see your shoes. :)

    I, like most men, are cool with just the head shot.... :)
     
  12. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

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    8,426
    Me personally I'm not into men like that. ;)
     
  13. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

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    8,426
    Nothing trashy of course it's to unbecoming of you Pukey. A classy pose like Marilyn. I know you could pull it off.
     
  14. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    I was referring to her head!!!!!

    ;)


    Yea, pukey, classy like marilyn. The steam grate shot would be cool, but face away from the camera, look back over your shoulder and put one finger in your mouth.

    ha ha ha ha ha

    I watch toooooo much tv.
     
  15. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    I don't think anything Marilyn did was classy. I'm not a fan of her. She was overrated... and a whore.
     
  16. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    And thats why she was loved!!!! She was a HORE!!!!
     
  17. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    Must be how she got movie roles as well. I can't stand her damn voice. It's so phony. Well, it used to be anyway. Now since she has no organs or face, I guess she's pretty silent.
     
  18. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

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    10,267
    ...Spent the evening a couple nights ago with the "one that got away" - whom, I'm guilty of the above infractions. Went over to her pad over an excuse that her computer got a virus and wouldn't boot. She even had the recovery discs. Her B-friend was at work, supposedly until 6AM or so, called twice, and aware that I was there.

    I'll probably never say this again in my life, but God Bless the Toshiba Windows Vista reformat/install process. It takes fucking forever. Long enough for her to throw a movie on and invite me to her bed.

    Her choice of movie was impeccable, too. "The Other Boleyn Girl" - a tale of trust, infidelity, lust, & deception. We had just finished the clean install of her system, and just as I finished with the err, "guest user" account, magically, heads came off, the movie ended, and there came a quiet knocking at the door... four hours early.

    Ironic, that the boyfriend that accused her of cheating a few weeks ago had to leave work early to come by and check up on her. His timing couldn't have been better. :biggrin:
     
  19. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,885
    I don't get it. So did you bang her or what?
     
  20. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

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    10,267
    C'mon, now - can't I write a story wherein I still appear to be the successful protagonist, without admitting that the boyfriend fucked the whole thing up?

    Do you have to ask such probing questions to break the cloud of uncertainty within the audience's mind when I'm trying to justify the time expenditure of that night in terms of future developments?

    It would've - and will be - on.

    Oh yes, she will be mine.

    Nevermind the apology call I got the next afternoon for our interruption, or the two calls from her this evening (while I was out of town, dammit...)
     

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