I was theorising yesterday about the current state of the world. I came to some pretty dramatic conclusions. First of all, as some of you know, there was a whale swimming in the Thames earlier on this week. That's right. A WHALE. Ring any bells? Of course it does. W-H-A-L-E. 5 letters. and what does 5 letters remind you of? THE CORRESPONDENCE BETWEEN JFK AND THE ROSACRUCIANS, OF COURSE! These well known 5 letters all referred to an enormous omnipresent being that JFK believed lived near the Whitehouse, devouring the souls of left-handed people and throwing their husk-like carcasses into tyre fires in and around the area. Tyre fires, I hear you say? YOU GOT IT! The exact same thing that happened on all four wheels of the car princess Diana was travelling in when it was set on fire. And who set it on fire? Our good friends the REPTILIANS. Come from outer space riding comets shaped like lucky charms cereal bites, they infiltrated women's rights groups around the country and started to poison cakes with mind-controlling substances. Some of these included... YOU GUESSED IT... Mobile phones. Hard to eat, but easy for them to dominate your mind with their VLF and UHF signals. This is known to make people greedy and conceited. MY MOBILE PHONE! HOW MANY LETTERS?....... You guessed it again! 13! And thirteen is the number of the beast. Sort of. So if you heard about the whale on television and thought nothing of it, think again. OPEN YOUR EYES
At least that was original, Smurf gets all of his bull-shit from insane people and there blogs and/or web sites.
Riiiiight. Economic depression? Weather control? Those hurricanes were mighty suspicious and the levees looked like they were blown, I wasn't the only one saying it. Apocalypse nigh. oh and "their", not "there"
Good call, I'll correct that for the next time I'm using the phrase. It was 6am where I am, what can I say.
