I will not carve gods. I will not spank others. I will not aim for the head. I will not barf unless I'm sick I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty. I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge. I will not conduct my own fire drills. Funny noises are not funny. I will not snap bras. I will not fake seizures. This punishment is not boring and pointless. My name is not Dr. Death. I will not defame New Orleans. I will not prescribe medication. I will not bury the new kid. I will not teach others to fly. I will not bring sheep to class. A burp is not an answer. Teacher is not a leper. Coffee is not for kids. I will not eat things for money. I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call. The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee. I will not call the principal "spud head". Goldfish don't bounce. Mud is not one of the 4 food groups. No one is interested in my underpants. I will not sell miracle cures. I will return the seeing-eye dog. I do not have diplomatic immunity. I will not charge admission to the bathroom. I will never win an emmy. The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy. All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy. I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause. I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers. My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man. I will not go near the kindergarten turtle. I am not deliciously saucy. Organ transplants are best left to professionals. The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan". I will not celebrate meaningless milestones. There are plenty of businesses like show business. Five days is not too long to wait for a gun. I will not waste chalk. I will not skateboard in the halls. I will not instigate revolution. I will not draw naked ladies in class. I did not see Elvis. I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes". Garlic gum is not funny. They are laughing at me, not with me. I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom. I will not encourage others to fly. I will not fake my way through life. Tar is not a plaything. I will not Xerox my butt. It's potato, not potatoe. I will not trade pants with others. I am not a 32 year old woman. I will not do that thing with my tongue. I will not drive the principal's car. I will not pledge allegiance to Bart. I will not sell school property. I will not burp in class. I will not cut corners. I will not get very far with this attitude. I will not belch the National Anthem. I will not sell land in Florida. I will not grease the monkey bars. I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment. I will not do anything bad ever again. I will not show off. I will not sleep through my education. I am not a dentist. Spitwads are not free speech. Nobody likes sunburn slappers. High explosives and school don't mix. I will not bribe Principal Skinner. I will not squeak chalk. I will finish what I sta "Bart Bucks" are not legal tender. Underwear should be worn on the inside. The Christmas Pageant does not stink. I will not torment the emotionally frail. http://www.bl.net/forwards/simpsons.shtml
Yay! I love the simpsons. How bout a list of Barts prank calls as a follow up? null(Great to see a post that has some entertainment value instead of "I hate you because..." type stuff)
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by elf like looking hippy that needs to bathe: null(Great to see a post that has some entertainment value instead of "I hate you because..." type stuff)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You come here start a personal attack on me, then post some hippy drivle like that? If you want to hold hands and make these forums a "love den" GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!! I won't let that happen... Why dont you goto stile project dot com and make a fucking friend who cares about you. General census here is you suck... God I hate old people... I really hate old whieny hippy people more. Now on a humourus note, hippy bitch told me she is a teacher. She teaches retarded children, and on top of that she is a pro-actvists of illegal substances. I wonder if the mongoliods that she teaches, parents know about this? She should post some pics of said mongoloids.. I need a goood laugh... HEre Ill start..:
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stranger: How bout a list of Barts prank calls as a follow up?[/i]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> (Some Enchanted Evening) Bart with Lisa and Maggie Phone call for Al...Al Coholic...is there an Al Coholic here? Wait a minute... Listen, you little yellow-bellied rat jackass, if I ever find out who you are, I'm gonna kill you! Bart and Lisa laugh (Some Enchanted Evening) Bart with Lisa and Maggie Oliver Clothesoff! Call for Oliver Clothesoff! Marge picks up the extension and hears: Listen, you lousy bum, if I ever get a hold of you, I swear I'll cut your belly open! (Homer's Odyssey) Bart with Lisa Uh, is I.P. Freely here? Hey, everybody, I.P. Freely! Wait a minute... Listen to me you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead. I swear I'm gonna slice your heart in half! Bart and Lisa laugh (Moaning Lisa) Bart with Lisa Uh, Jacques Strap! Hey guys, I'm looking for a Jacques Strap! Oh, wait a minute...Jacques Strap It's you isn't it ya cowardly little runt? When I get a hold of you, I'm gonna gut you like a fish and drink your blood! Bart laughs (One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish) Bart with Lisa Hey, is there a Butz here? Seymour Butz? Hey, everybody, I wanna Seymour Butz! Oh, wait a minute... Listen, you little scum-sucking pus-bucket! When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna put out your eyeballs with a corkscrew! Bart and Lisa laugh (Principal Charming) Bart (in Principal Skinner's office) Uh, Homer Sexual? Aw, come on, come on, one of you guys has gotta be Homer Sexual! Homer says "Don't look at me!" Oh, no... You rotten little punk! If I ever get a hold of you, I'll sink my teeth into your cheek and rip your face off! Skinner, on the other end of the line, says "You'll do what, young man?" (Blood Feud) Mike Rotch! Mike Rotch! Hey, has anybody seen Mike Rotch lately? Listen to me, you little puke. One of these days, I'm going to catch you, and I'm going to carve my name on your back with an ice pick! Bart and Lisa laugh (Treehouse of Horror II) Bart with Mrs. Krabappel and one of the Sherri/Terri twins Uh, hey, everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt Oh, wait a minute... Bart laughs; Mrs. Krabappel sees him and then laughs as well (Flaming Moe's) Bart Uh, Hugh Jass? Oh, somebody check the men's room for a Hugh Jass! There is a Hugh Jass at Moe's; he takes the call (Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk) Bart Bea O'Problem! Bea O'Problem! Come on, guys, do I have a Bea O'Problem here? Barney says "You sure do!" Oh...it's you, isn't it? Listen, you. When I get a hold of you, I'm going to use your head for a bucket and paint my house with your brains! Bart laughs (New Kid on the Block) Bart Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss? Barney says "Maybe your standards are too high!" You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt! Bart tells Moe his name is Jimbo Jones and gives his own address: Jimbo and Laura Powers are making out in Bart's living room (New Kid on the Block) Laura Powers with Bart Ivana Tinkle? Ivana Tinkle? All right, everybody, put down your glasses, Ivana Tinkle! Laura and Bart laugh (The PTA Disbands) This isn't at Moe's; Moe is taking over as the substitute teacher for Mrs. Krabappel's class during the strike OK, when I call your name, uh, you say "present" or "here". Er, no, say "present". Ahem, Anita Bath? The students in the classroom laugh All right, settle down. Anita Bath here? More laughs All right, fine, fine. Maya Buttreeks! Still more laughs Hey, what are you laughing at? What? Oh, oh, I get it, I get it. It's my big ears, isn't it, kids? Isn't it? Well, children, I can't help that! Moe runs out of the classroom crying as Bart crosses Moe's name off of a list of what are now former substitute teachers (Homer the Smithers) Mr. Burns says "I'm looking for a Mr. Smithers, first name Wayland" Oh, so, you're looking for a Mr. Smithers, eh? First name Wayland, is it? Listen to me, you; when I catch you, I'm gonna pull out your eyes and stick 'em down your pants, so you can watch me kick the crap outta you, okay? Then I'm gonna use your tongue to paint my boat! (Bart on the Road) (Homer) Hello, I'd like to speak with a Mr. Snotball, first name Eura (Moe) Eura Snotball? (Homer) What? How dare you! If I find out who this is, I'll staple a flag to your butt and mail you to Iran!
Some homerisms "Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen" "If we had $10,000 we'd be millionaires. We could buy all kinds of neat stuff, like love." "Its a crock, no matter how good you are there is someone better." [Bart then says ``Can't win, don't try''] "If something's hard to do then it's not worth doing." "If stuff starts flying, just turn your head!" "Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try." "Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose--it's how drunk you get." "I used to believe in things too when I was a kid." "Stupid risks are what make life worth living." "Two wrongs make a right, Lisa" "The three little sentences that will get you through life: 1.Cover for me. 2.Oh, good idea, Boss! 3.It was like that when I got here. "If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in everyday and do it really half-assed. That's the American Way." "Weaseling out of things is important to boy. Its what seperates us from the animals. Except the weasels!" "I'm no supervising technician, I'm a technical supervisor." "Beer. Now there's a temporary solution." "Operator, give me the number for nine-one-one" "And Lord, we are especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is. Except for solar, which is just a pipe dream." "Pffft, English. Who needs that. I'm never going to England." "If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English." "Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds, they make ice and... um... [spots his can of Duff] Oh, wait a minute. Actually, a woman is more lot like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!" "It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fir in eight hours of TV a day." "Donuts...is there anything they CAN'T do?" "Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation." "Heh, heh. Lisa, vampires are make-believe, just like elves, gremlins, and eskimos." "Kill my boss? Do I dare to live out the American dream?" "Aw, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. 14 percent of all people know that." "Aw, Dad. You've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man now, and old people are useless." "Well, I'm tired of being a wannabe league bowler. I wanna be a league bowler!" "What's the point of going out? We're just gonna wind up back here anyway." "I guess some people never change. Or, they quickly change and then quickly change back." "You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on."
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by People = Shit: If you want to hold hands and make these forums a "love den" GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!! I won't let that happen... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Amen... [ August 29, 2001: Message edited by: Nursey ]
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by People = Shit: If you want to hold hands and make these forums a "love den" GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!! I won't let that happen...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> me neither... this forums always been about hate... thats the way i like it.. thats the way it'll stay.. and thats the general concensus... as well as...... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote yup.. fuck off hippy.. go join hands round the world and weave yourself a hessian throw rug or whatever it is hippies do to make themselves feel like useful members of the community SPEEDY!!!!!! [ August 29, 2001: Message edited by: PimpDaddy v2.01beta ]
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by GreenAppleSplatters in The Pink-Brown Eye thread Page 3: Now that I think aboot it,it kinda is therapy.I let my mean side out in here.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> if you don't like our little corner of the net dedicated to negativity.. there's a nice friendly forum at.. http://www.origin.org/ucs/forum/forum.cfm i think you may prefer it there... and that goes for anyone else who comes in here whining that "you lot are so mean!!"
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PimpDaddy v2.01beta: me neither... this forums always been about hate... thats the way i like it.. thats the way it'll stay.. and thats the general concensus...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Fugly!
quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally posted by People = Shit: If you want to hold hands and make these forums a "love den" GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!! I won't let that happen... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Nursey: Amen... [ August 29, 2001: Message edited by: Nursey ]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> We should have IMCisms too. [ August 30, 2001: Message edited by: GreenAppleSplatters ]
Oh no! I came here thinking i could make some new friends and now you have crushed my fragile little heart. I mean you all seemed so nice and caring and all. I thaught if I put up that post bout IMC then he would forgive me for shooting him down in flames in ICQ. I have been so misled. *sniff snivel* And then you go and call me a hippy and say I am old! *boohoo sob sob* Next you will prolly be calling me fat and jealous *wails loudly* Maybe I should just quit my job, sell the house and move to that Rainbow People commune after all. Then I could grow lentals to feed the starving children. *snots loudly into several pieces of toilet paper* Why are you people so mean? *slashes wrists with the rough edge of a canned tofu lid*
UHHHHHHHH...JESUS!!!-It's that smell again!You know-people who work with retarded shitsacks smell of it,but in this case it's mixed with oil of patchouli...where the fuck is it coming from???
Haven't Care Bear pics been posted by someone in here before...? Or am I just imagining things with my drug infused brain?
