A man and woman are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. The candles are lit, the romance is outrageous. But then the lady stops and says, "No, I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." The guy sits up in bed and screams "WHAT??" She explains that she be in tune with her emotional needs as a Woman. He realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight, and he might as well deal with it. So the next day the man takes her shopping at a big department store. He walks around and has her try on three very expensive outfits. She can't decide. He tells his woman to take all three of them. Then they go over and get matching shoes worth $200 each. And then they go to the Jewelry Department where she gets a set of diamond earrings. The lady is so excited. She thinks her guy has flipped out, but she does not care. She goes for the tennis bracelet. He says "you don't even play tennis, but OK if you like it then let's get it." The woman is jumping up and down so excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says "I am ready to go, lets go to the cash register." The man stops and says, "No, I don't feel like buying all this stuff now." The woman's face goes blank. "Well honey- I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." The look on her face is indescribable, she is about to explode and the guy says, "I must be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."
Quite funny the first 5 times you hear it. Oh, and thats a man not getting any for a long, long time.
