apparently.... IF WOMEN DRINK: Drink : Beer. Personality : Casual, low maintenance; down to earth. Approach : Challenge her to a game of pool. Drink : Blender drinks with umbrella. Personality : Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the bum. Approach : Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy. Drink : Mixed drinks - no umbrellas Personality : Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants. Approach : If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink. Drink : Wine - (bottled, not 4 litre cask) Personality : Conservative and classy, sophisticated. Approach : Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation. Drink : Bacardi Breezer Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated - actually has absolutely no clue. Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is...and you're in. Drink : Baileys. Personality : Annoying voice, bit of a tart. Approach : Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub. Drink : Shorts (Vodka, Aftershock etc.). Personality : Hanging with male pals or looking to get drunk...and naked. Approach : Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait. IF MEN DRINK - As always, very simple and clear cut. Cider : He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid. Cheap Domestic Beer : He's poor / student and wants to get laid. Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to get laid. Bitter : He's old, he likes good beer and wants to get laid. Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid Wine : He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid. Vodka or Brandy : Extremely horny hound, would have sex with a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid. Port : Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid. Whisky : He doesn't give two shits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid. Jack Daniels : Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid. Tequila : Piss off you wankers, I'm gonna go shag something with a pulse. Bacardi Breezer : He's gay (Blatantly).
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Wankah': A tablespoon of jism isnt too bad. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Better open up wider than that...
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Friar Bitchicus Slapiticus: Hmmm... and what exactly would that be?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Matthew: I have found that dogs really like the taste of antifreeze.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> wow, and what happens after they drink it?
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Matthew: You should try it. Feed it to your dog.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> hmmmmm, not my baby...
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Matthew: ooh, well im sure there are some k9's around the neighborhood that you can experiment on.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> no, i would feel guilty