You know, I have no problem with people of any race or color. I don't even consider it a factor important to any kind of relationship. Generally, I am about as far from being racist as you can get (I know that doesn't really always fit in around here, but whatever). Anyway, there is one group of people I really can't stand, though. The Fucking French I hate those Frenchy bastards, well maybe not all of them, in fact, I can think of a few French people I've been good friends with but I'm willing just to call them the exceptions that make the rule and stick to the generalization. Fucking Frenchies. Here are three facts I want the French to know: <UL TYPE=SQUARE><LI>The Eiffel Tower sucks. When you ride in that elevator all you can think about is the extremely low level of safety requirements that you know are in effect in this Third-World-esque city. <LI>Just because wine is cheap and popular doesn't mean it's good. CASE IN POINT: The Pat Benetar look. <LI>Just because your country had a good ride between 1830 and 1910 doesn't mean you're still the height of civilization now (YES I KNOW PEOPLE WILL BE SAYING THIS ABOUT AMERICA WITHIN 50 YEARS, STFUTYVM!) [/list] Anyway. The last time I was in Paris sucked. It's full of those bastards trying to sell you a sketch of your portrait for $80 (they think you're too stupid to realize that 450 franks is a lot of money). I tried to be kind to one guy. I looked at the pictures he showed me and seemed to marvel at his skill. I tried to explain very kindly and with great care that I was a poor student traveling on the cheap and would love to buy one of his sketches but I really couldn't pay him what he required. I tried but he wouldn't listen and followed me for two blocks with his sketchpad, haggling and hounding me. I finally had to lean in and say, "Look here, Pierre, if you don't get lost I'm gonna stick that fucking sketchpad where the sun don't shine." He ran off fast as hell, no doubt to tell everyone what assholes Americans are. There's tons of petty crime and pick pocketing in France. Damn it, I'm from Detroit and I believe that if you're going to try and rob me, you could at least do me the courtesy of sticking a fucking gun in my face so I can act like I couldn't do anything about it later. No matter how nice you try to be, even if you try to speak French to them and respect their culture, they're still rude to you because you're an American. One time at the Louvre, this lady was acting like she couldn't understand my request for a ticket because I looked a little scruffy and I placed my request in American English. I tried to be very polite (I even said, "Une Karte, ci vous ples) but she just taunted me by holding up her hands as if she couldn't understand. I was pissed so I said in a very loud voice so everyone in line could hear, "Oh, I see, you want to let me in for free because you find me so sexually attractive." She venomously whispered "fouhrtee fahhhve Frahnks" and sneered at me. I gave her one of those "Fuck you, bitch" looks and moved on. No doubt she told everyone what an asshole Americans are too. I never have this kind of trouble in the UK, or Belgium, or Holland, or Germany (well, I speak a little German so I probably fit in a little better), or Mexico or Canada for that matter. People are great and often tell me that I'm "Not a Typical American" (whatever that means). Not the French, though, they just hate and hate. SO NOW MY POINT: Those French fuckers who do gymnastics and jump over walls and climb buildings and such have signed a contract to do commercials for Nike. They run around and do silly things to sell American Sweatshop Shoes. I saw them on a BBC special a few years back claiming to be "Pure Artists" (whatever that means) of a new and unstained type. Now they're pitching Air Jordans. Isn't it amazing how Americans are scum to the French unless their names are "George", "Abe", "Alex" or "Ben"?
To be honest, you do not need to be American to be hated by the French. I have to go to Paris on business two or three times a year, us brits are treat with the same contempt as you guys it seems. Couple of years ago the French government understood this and tried to address the situation, had an ad campaign and such, just made the fuckers worse. Paris is a beautiful city, some of the girls are the most attractive I have ever seen, you just never get over the feeling that after talking to a Paris(ite) that it seems like you have been wiped off the bottom of a shoe. In consolation, remind yourself they are a nation of cowards, fuck it if a car backfires in Paris the whole country surrenders!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stymie: To be honest, you do not need to be American to be hated by the French. I have to go to Paris on business two or three times a year, us brits are treat with the same contempt as you guys it seems. Couple of years ago the French government understood this and tried to address the situation, had an ad campaign and such, just made the fuckers worse. Paris is a beautiful city, some of the girls are the most attractive I have ever seen, you just never get over the feeling that after talking to a Paris(ite) that it seems like you have been wiped off the bottom of a shoe. In consolation, remind yourself they are a nation of cowards, fuck it if a car backfires in Paris the whole country surrenders!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Check out my Audio Interactive response! I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now, go away, or I shall taunt you a second time-a! [ August 11, 2002: Message edited by: HighClass-WhiteTrash 1337 ]
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by HighClass-WhiteTrash 1337: Check out my Audio Interactive response! I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now, go away, or I shall taunt you a second time-a! [ August 11, 2002: Message edited by: HighClass-WhiteTrash 1337 ]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> hehe, happens to be true, I fart in your general direction, where the fuck have I heard that? Was it Monty Python?
My apologies ss, that post was from a somewhat confused mind. Never mix the grape with the grain. (Keith Moon) [ August 14, 2002: Message edited by: stymie ]
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stymie: My apologies ss, that post was from a somewhat confused mind. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Stupidity is an affliction not a condition
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote You and 93% of your nation. It's also worth noting that something like 65% of Americans don't hold a passport. What the fuck is that all about? The Yanks I have met whilst travelling tend to be some of the nicest people I've ever shared a spliff/beer/woman with... Come on travel more I say, come to the UK and I'll put you up!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dubya G Grace: You and 93% of your nation. It's also worth noting that something like 65% of Americans don't hold a passport. What the fuck is that all about? The Yanks I have met whilst travelling tend to be some of the nicest people I've ever shared a spliff/beer/woman with... Come on travel more I say, come to the UK and I'll put you up!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Holding a passport is different in America, because the country is so big and it takes so long to get somewhere we would need it (we don't need it to go to Mexico or Canada).
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Goddess Yummy: Holding a passport is different in America, because the country is so big and it takes so long to get somewhere we would need it (we don't need it to go to Mexico or Canada).<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> We need a passport to go there now (Thank you, fucking terrorists ). They want a passport to cross into Canada (but they will take a voter registration card and two forms of pic ID if the line is long). NOT THAT ANYONE WOULD WANT TO GO TO CANADA unless they were 19-20 because they could drink there at that age. I say it's worth going to Europe so get a passport! Just remember that most European cities are just like American cities in that they are weekend towns unless you know someone there (Don't plan on filling a week in Brussels because you can only look at the Menekin Pis so many times). See a lot of stuff because it's all pretty close. Also, take the train because it's not like Amtrack, where you see nothing but industrial waste sites and ghetto. It's not as expensive as you think. Accomodations are very reasonable in Europe if you go with guest houses (and let's face it, most of you sluts will be having a stranger in bed anyway). Keep your pie hole shut and don't wear sneakers and you should be OK.
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote And be prepared to drink larger amounts of beer, and of a much better quality too![/LIST]
Cool, I will wear my Birks (why do straight men hate them so much???) and that tshirt where Jesus is getting a blow job from a kid When I was 19 my best friend and I were going to fly to Korea (where she was from) and do Asia and Europe and end up flying back from London. We were going to do that instead of a year of college. It would a much more productive year if we had gone
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Goddess Yummy: When I was 19 my best friend and I were going to fly to Korea (where she was from) and do Asia and Europe and end up flying back from London. We were going to do that instead of a year of college. It would a much more productive year if we had gone <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Damn right! Nobody tells you that, instead of spending money on college, you could go to India and live like a king for like five or six years. What did I get out of college? A job. Who the fuck wants to work?
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Minister Saint-Fond: Damn right! Nobody tells you that, instead of spending money on college, you could go to India and live like a king for like five or six years. What did I get out of college? A job. Who the fuck wants to work?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> If I had played my cards right I could have become a terrorist by now!!! Imagine the posibilities...instead of the WTC I could have bombed Ticketmaster and Microsoft!
