Brighten up dull Monday mornings at work by concealing a bottle of vodka in your jacket pocket and taking swigs from it at regular intervals throughout the day. T. Horswill. Bedford.
Don't spend a fortune buying expensive oven gloves. Boxing gloves, available from most sports shops, will do the job just as well. littleErn. Bingley.
I don't know what the fuck a Ming is but it reminds me of Arabs. DIE!!!!!! RAAAA!!!! *blood curdling cry of war followed by insane amounts of froth and spittle*