I was pissing myself laughing when reading these instructions on how it use a penis enlarger.Thought i'd share. USE OF THE VACUUM PUMP AND CYLINDERS: 1.Connect the pump to the cylinder by pushing the male coupler on the pump hose to the female coupler on the cylinder. You will hear an audible click when the two couplers are successfully connected. (To disconnect the couplers push in on the metal tab on the side of the female connector and the hose will be released). The female coupler attached to the cylinder may be turned clockwise to release pressure from the cylinder and tightened so the vacuum will remain in the cylinder. (Never over-tighten the coupler to avoid damage) Premium pumps have an air-release mechanism on the side of the body of the pump (A small pin like on a tire stem) just push in and release while cylinder is attached. 2.You may release the hose from the cylinder with the quick disconnect valve after you have reached the desired pressure. The valve allows pressure to be held without being attached to the pump. 3.Before placing the penis inside of the cylinder lubricate your penis well with a personal lubricant. We suggest "Penis Enlargement Stuff" a premium quality water based brand that is available from our online store. Formulated with Herbs and vitamins to attain a maximum lubricity for use by vacuum pumpers on sensitive skin and delicate tissue. Lube the penis well so it will be drawn into the cylinder with limited friction, ensuring comfort and maximum results. Apply some lube to the flared area of the cylinder to help in attaining a good vacuum seal. 4.Some pumpers shave or trim the hair at the base of the pubis to help maintain a good vacuum seal. Alternately, a thick petroleum based lubricant (like Vaseline) can be used to help achieve a seal if you are very hairy. Petroleum based lubes are messy and don't wash off as easily as our Penis Enlargement Stuff. 5.Place the penis in the cylinder, hold the cylinder against the groin area of the body and pump gently until you find the best comfort level for you, each person's comfort level is different. To avoid having your scrotum sack sucked in the tube pull down on your testicles and sack till the pressure is formed in the cylinder. 6.Do not vacuum pump for more than 15 minutes at a time. Only pump to a level of comfort, never past that point. This will be different for each individual, as tissue types vary from person to person. Take it easy, it is not necessary to use a lot of pressure to get good results. (For those who have a premium pump, pressure levels should be kept between 4-6 on the outside vacuum gauge.) We find the best results are achieved with a 15 minute session 4 times a week. Advanced pumpers may choose to pump 2-3 sessions per day, with a rest period of 10-15 minutes between each. 7.Heat helps with the expansion and softening of tissue, we suggest pumping while in the bath, shower or Jacuzzi. When using a premium pump you should vacuum the cylinder and disconnect the pump (Premium pumps are only to be used in a dry environment) Some suggest use of a heating pad or heat lamp, we advise extreme caution in use of external heating devices, as they may cause damage. (Note also that using electrical devices in or near water is obviously not a good idea.) 8.Experimentation will be the best teacher of what is best for you, take the time to experiment for the best experience with your system. Many men enjoy masturbating while in the cylinder. Your dedication to regular pumping (like exercise) on a daily basis, will produce the best over all results. 9.After each pumping session we recommend that you massage your genitals, take your time, this will help you attain maximum results and good penis health. CARE AND STORAGE OF PUMPS AND CYLINDERS. Pumps should cleaned after use and stored dry. Cylinders may be cleaned with a mild antibacterial detergent like Ivory liquid. Avoid using harsh chemicals or abrasive materials in order to preserve the clarity of your cylinders. Cylinder connectors should be loosened slightly prior to storage. (i.e.: not screwed tight.) Cleaning cylinders or pumps in an automatic dishwasher is NOT recommended, and will void your warranty. HINTS FOR FORESKIN PUMPING Place the clear plastic foreskin ball on the head of the penis. Carefully pull the foreskin over the ball. Make sure to put a liberal amount of lubricant on the foreskin, penis head and cylinder. Place the foreskin cylinder over the foreskin and the clear plastic foreskin ball ( make sure the pump is already attached to the foreskin cylinder) and pump gently until you have drawn the foreskin around the foreskin ball and into the foreskin cylinder. This is a rather complicated and somewhat awkward process, but many have reported favorable success. Follow the hints above, they apply to foreskin pumping as well as penis pumping. We are dedicated to SAFE, HEALTHY SEX. Our Penis Enlargement Stuff is latex condom compatible. If you use an oil or petroleum based lubricant it is not condom safe. (Oil based lubes degrade the latex and will cause condoms to break.) Please check to see if your lube is safe, PLAY RESPONSIBLY, PLAY SAFE!!!!! WARNING: To avoid injury or aggravation of preexisting conditions, vacuum pumps should not be used on rashes, swollen or inflamed areas or skin lacerations. Discontinue use immediately if you experience any pain. We recommend you do not keep the vacuum applied for longer than 15 minutes. If you feel any pain or discomfort stop using the product immediately and consult a physician. These products are recreational in nature, and are offered as novelty items. The producers, manufacturer and distributors disclaim any responsibility or liability, in connection with the use of these products. --------------------------------------- Just looks like an excuse for a wank to me.
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote This has to be my favourite bit. Imagine going to the hospital with your scrotum sucked into it
im on a mobile internet thing at myloacl and i get tostay kate as the manager loves me as im all wayss here ans pissed... any way i cant type
pass out i was given a drink of wdk 2 times and three duoble vodkas the other night and alll i did was fall down on the floor when goin home and i didnt pass out once,,.,.. im like a piss head or summit
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by unlimited time: Fuck im going to bed before Klit started masturbating <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> i am nutting on my keyboard!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dodgygeezerbird: sis..do u really think anyone is goin to fuckin bother readin that? XXX<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Awwwww, sisterly love at it's best...where's your sister gone then DGB? Tell her I miss her and also I believe you're not married? *waxes eyebrows and brushes tongue*
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="verdana">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dodgygeezerbird: sis..do u really think anyone is goin to fuckin bother readin that? XXX<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Some of the people in here surprisingly have a larger IQ than a sprout so i got a 50/50 chance of someone reading it hun. and you made post bitch
Hey there wank ya fat whore how you doing,ive missed your sorry ass....not,so then who's been hanging out the back of you lately babes??
