I just peed in a Cool Whip bowl

I hate having one bathroom. I'm seriously gonna look into putting a toilet in the garage.

 

Become a man - the world is our urinal.

 

Pissing outside is till one of my favorite things to do even after all these years. It's very liberating...

 

I got really drunk. Didn't piss in a bowl.... but almost pissed myself. I certainly vomited a bit. Now its nearly 4AM and Im coming to my senses. If I have to piss again, I'm just gonna go in my fuckin pants. The walk to the bathroom is just too far. Fuck my life.

 

And it's our ashtray too!

 

That reminds me of a song:

I'm wearin' myself a t-shirt that says "The world is my ashtray"
Our hearts pump dust and our hairs all grey

 

That was sad and funny at the same time.

 

So where is the strangest place you peed?

I peed off of a covered bridge once somewhere in the backwoods of Ohio. I also peed on a bridge at a park somewhere, but the strangest place I peed was definitely the kid's playhouse.

I know I posted about it. Here it is:

Oh yeah, last night, the wheel was starting to come completely off from my roommate's piece of shit car (it used to be a cop car, what'd ya expect?) and we were all over the interstate tire smoking, one of my friend's on the verge of hysteria, the other one singing, "Every Rose Has It's Thorn", a song I loathe, BTW... We made it to a gas station and stopped... somehow, 'cause the brakes were shot as well. Anyway, we were an hour away from home and the gas station was closed and I had to piss. I have mental problems (can ya tell?) and can't piss in public places. Even if the gas station was open it wouldn't have helped me. Anyway, the lot next door was selling storage buildings and things of that sort, so I thought, "Fuck it, maybe I can piss in there." I had 3 other people making fun of me because I couldn't just go behind the gas station like everyone else. So we try the storage buildings, all locked. Then we try a big wooden child's playhouse... unlocked!! I'm in there a good 20 minutes, but finally I let loose a 3 minute stream, completely soaking the floor. Some little kid's not going have a very merry x-mas!

 

it is great having a baby and a stroller with a cup holder... because I have pissed in dressing rooms like 5-6 times in the past year. I pee into my cup, wipe with a baby wipe. My first stop in the mall is always Starbucks for a green tea lemonade. by the time it is half way gone, I am in a dressing room and cant hold it... and my body thinks...hmm this looks like bathroom...and I immediately have to piss in my green tea. This is the reason the Arab will not drink those anymore.

I also pee in my driveway a lot and in many other parking lots.

When my back was out, I peed in a Quick Trip plastic cup for a week. My sister that was here helping me, and constantly having to pour out my piss and rinse the cup...will no longer drink fountain drink from Quick Trip.

 

I think you need a diaper

 

I think you need some lipstick.

 

oh Homewrecker... I love you.

I would go down on you, but I know if I tried to spread your legs, one would pop off.

 

Does this do anything for you?

 

wow that would suck... I have 2 big fat legs, and when I go to the beach I always get "sand snatch"... I bet she has one grainy gash.

reminds me of a movie that was filmed in my old apartment complex called "boxing Helena" a guy was in live with this girl and saved her after she was hit by a car, but then cut off her legs and then her arms...kept her as a pet. My first husband was an extra in that movie ... you can see him walk into a video store. The movie was shot before I lived there, and before I knew him. I kinda wanna watch it again.... even though if I remember correctly- it was kinda shitty