Talked so fast that she probably signed me up for cocaine addiction counseling. She kept looking at my hands and I can't figure out why. I know I move them a lot when I talk, but she was making me really paranoid about it so I was trying not to move them at all. Then she was making that direct eye contact thing that freaks me out when I am aware someone is doing it so I got all shaky like a crackhead and my eyes felt like they were darting all around like a pervert in a whorehouse. Now I get to go to the drug dealer and then I go back for more cognitive therapy for the GAD and OCD. I like abbreviated illnesses. Barry would be so proud.
Barry is very proud of you Pukey. Next thing you know you will be having the neighbors over for coffee and cake.
Second visit is pretty good. you usually get to ride the orgasmatron while the staff watches through the two way mirror.
I'm supposed to be journaling my anxiety and irrational thoughts. Problem is, I don't know what is irrational. I had a mini-panic attack while getting my hair cut today. That sucked. The adrenaline didn't fully kick in, thank god or I would have been reaching for my Atenolol.
Yeah. Adrenaline is a bitch when it kicks in for absolutely no reason. I have been researching drugs 'cause I know they are going to put me on something and I refuse another SSRI. I have been reading about Doxepin and it sounds pretty good except for the paralytic ileus that could result. I've already been through a bowel obstuction and I really don't want to repeat it. The other one I thought about was Nortriptyline.
I'm glad to hear you're going to see a doctor for all this stuff. There are drugs that can fix anything these days. They'll get you sorted out sooner or later. Don't worry.
Thanks. I think more than anything, the cognitive therapy should be the most beneficial. I need to learn how to "think" again and it's going to be rough. Oh, I also found one called Remerol and I think it's the one I want to try. If anyone knows anything about the above drugs, let me know.
