I used someone's toothbrush to clean their piss off under the seat that did that to me once. A pube (not mine) got stuck to it so I swished it around in the trashcan a few times to get it off. I still don't feel bad about it to this day. He had been warned.
lame, lame, lame. This is what phatboy excels in. He is always serving up pbj's and acting like he is a world class chef. Get used to it if you plan on sticking around.
What I love is when you walk into a stall, and notice a huge turd in the tank, WITH NO PAPER. Oh, and in public, I never courtesy flush. It's bad enough that you sometimes get a splashback at home, but out in public? I don't care if it's fresh water, the fact remains, that the tank has been home to thousands of others' feces and urine, and that just kinda puts me into the mindset of 'fuck the courtesy flush.' Even if you stand up, the chance exists that it will splash and hit the seat. Funny story I just remembered... During my fifth grade Science fair, I stepped away from my booth to go to the bathroom, and, at that time, not wanting to touch the seat, I would perch myself over the commode, hover above the seat, and drop off my parcel. So, if you can imagine myself bent over (Dan's favorite position,) I start to shit, and right behind my turd resided a massive pocket of gas, which propelled the turd like a bullet, past the bowl, and hitting the wall directly behind the tank. My anally-propelled stink bullet slid down the wall, and anyone within earshot would've probably given me a standing ovation. Unfortunately, the theater was bare, and there were no witnesses to my rectal shotgun.
There were some rectal shotgun slingers in the building where I worked in Kuwait. I thought they must have had some kind of baboon-like external asshole angled at near 90 degrees to be able to spatter-paint the bowl in such fecanomenal fashion. Brush as you flush, people.
This is the stupidest fucking thread. Why a bunch of retards feel the need to discuss taking a dump in a public restroom is a mystery to me. Obviously the only way to do this is to not sit down and let it shoot out from above the seat. Secondly this should only be done if necessary and is usally the result of poor planning. Bowel movements usually occur after eating as their is a reflex that occurs following eating. If one is to go out on the town he/she should attempt to have a bowel movement first especially if one plans on eating a big meal.
That is disgusting, about as bad as the turd scraper, you know the person that sits so far back on the toilet it leaves a streak on the seat. I also am not a big fan of the claw marks, like the turd was fighting for its life trying not to be flushed.
Ok how about pissing on the school principal? Story goes like this. Freshman year in High school when someone was at the urinal pissing we would come up and shake the hell out of them. Causing them to piss on them self. Pretty funny huh? Till you/they figure out that they must take revenge. So this guy Luke comes in and has a shit eating grin on his face so I mention "Luke if you come close I'll piss on you fair warning" well a few seconds later I hear someone step behind me. Sticking to my word I spun around and to my suprise there was the principal. I may be the only guy in highschool ever to piss on the principal.
Just remember Pukey. I'm your friend and would NEVER piss on your toilet seat. But excuse me if I hide my tooth brush from you. Nothing personal.
