{snickering} Yup, that's pretty much my evaluation after my one trip there. Me and the owner of a biz I worked at once drove there to deliver some equipment & schmooze the client. We 'coincidentally' arranged it on the Friday the client's company was having their annual company picnic. SO, we drop the gear & follow his directions out to the shindig. We'd been partying a bit on the way up, of course, but maintained minimum sobriety out of respect. So we were eager to get ripped & hit on some local ho's. Well, arriving at the big bash & surveying the scene, Vince and I quickly determined there certainly was no shortage of skankage: the women on the whole looked like the female contingent of a West Virginia hillbilly family reunion. Ah well, we reasoned, nothing a gallon or 2 of brew can't improve markedly. We looked around for the beer...hmm, no obvious wetbar table...gotta be a keg around here somewhere. We approached the nearest fuglite with a cup in her hand and asked her where the beer was. She looked at us like we'd asked her to sniff our farts: "OH...there's no alcohol!" Some fine, wholesame Ohio-family atmosphere of a so-called party. Jeebus... Vince & I got semi-lucky eventually. After striking up a conversation with a young mullethead & his not-unattractive girlfriend - that is, her being a 5 among all the other 1s and 2s made her look like an 8 - we conveyed our desire and query about the prospects of finding something in the way of social activity more stimulating than egg-tossing and sack-racing. "Yeah," he smirked, "This place sucks, doesn't it??" Shortly we all found ourselves in a hotel room, pouring liquor down our gullets & producing huge clouds of decent smoke, blasting a boombox, and playing strip poker. Alas, the b-friend was too solicitous of his bitch, and kept laying down himself to prevent any critical immodesty on her part. By then Vince & I had quietly discussed the possibility of beating him up & commencing real fun with her. But we were really too mellowed out by then, and anyway they took their staggering leave shortly after. Yep, high times in Newcomerstown, Ohio. It did look better in the rearview mirror.
Where the fuck did you go to in Ohio, IMC? I went through Newcomerstown last weekend. Don't roll down your fucking window... that place reeks of cow shit! I got to see a big ol' basket made of bricks in Dresden and an old abandoned mansion built in 1857, so the trip wasn't a total loss. Next stop... Lancaster, Ohio.
