Michelle's Amusing/Entertaning/Disgussting/Boring/Exploitive/Stupid Medical Stor

Discussion in 'General Mayhem' started by Michelle, Feb 12, 2007.

  1. Michelle

    Michelle New Member

    Messages:
    634
    es. No real pts names or locations so they are anonymous and everything is kosher you dumbasses who are going to make the usual comments about Hippa violations.

    Okay a short one because I don't have time and am too tired to remember the whole story. WHile doing a rotation in the psych a patient with major depressive disorder who was resistnat to meds was getting his 12th electorshock treatment about 8 am in the morning. He was postictal for a while and then just laid in bed until noon. When he finally got up and I went to interview him I asked him how he felt and although he was having trouble remembering things as is typical with patients who have gotten electroshock therapy he says He feels like his shock treatment was "like a drop kick from Jesus". It was hard to keep from laughing. I actually got along real well with the guy. Of course he could get cranky if the psych doctor withheld his benzos.
     
  2. Michelle

    Michelle New Member

    Messages:
    634
    of course the next day he was saying he wanted to kill himself again. Maybe he was or maybe he just wanted more psych meds.
     
  3. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606
    ..or maybe he wanted you to do another prostate exam with your "special" technique.
     
  4. Michelle

    Michelle New Member

    Messages:
    634
    The electroconvulsive therapy treatments are actually pretty impressive. We strapped the patient down and put electrodes onto his head and an anesthesiologist put him to sleep. He wasn't intubated but we put a guard in his mouth because essentially what we did was induce a a siezure. It used to be that patients could get injured but now they use muslce relaxants to prevent severe spasms. Even with that I think it should be reserved for the truly worst case depressives who would most likely commit suicide anyway. I am not convinced that the memory loss is limited to the short term in the majority of people. Here is a kind of halloween video showing someone who got the therapy back in the day when they used more "juice". I'm sure it's not as bad now but shocking someone's brain just intuitively doesn't seem all that safe to me.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXC6b0xy4ts
     
  5. MAJ Havoc

    MAJ Havoc Active Member

    Messages:
    3,123
    Ironic that a healing technique and a form of death penalty would be so similar. Reminds me of some stuff I saw on "Faces of Death" as a teenager. Much more gruesome.
     
  6. Michelle

    Michelle New Member

    Messages:
    634
    They use a paralyzer now so that the muscles don't contract like that anymore. I think it may be succinylcholine or vancurium.
     
  7. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606

    Could you hook me up with a low dose buzz of juice Dan? I think I am depressed.
     
  8. Michelle

    Michelle New Member

    Messages:
    634
    You know better. That shit is reserved for people who are high risk suicide. Frying your brain is a last option.
     
  9. Disorder

    Disorder New Member

    Messages:
    2,055
    You wanted to die, but haha, now we're going to keep you alive as a vegetable. I bet if you could smile, you'd have one right now. No answer? No problem then.
     
  10. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606
    Man, that brought tears to my eyes. That's the first time you ever acknowledged that I know anything.

    So now that we are like great friends, why don't you move down here and join my practice? I need a pill Doctor on staff. I could keep you booked with clients, and all you have to do is write 'scripts for antidepressants, benzos and an occasional suitcase load of oxycotin. No gross exams, not sweat, just sit and write.

    I can guarantee you $120,000 a year to start, and free housing. Margaritaville is 30 minutes away, and there are girls here who clamor for rich arrogant white boys.

    So, are you in?
     
  11. MAJ Havoc

    MAJ Havoc Active Member

    Messages:
    3,123
    *Note to self: Prepare "For Sale" sign for house in anticipation of plummeting property values.
     
  12. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606
    You should get a premium price with that Indian Burial Mound next door.
     
  13. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

    Messages:
    6,956
    Is there anywhere in the south that isnt near an indian burial mound?
     
  14. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606
    Yes, Major's House.
     
  15. MAJ Havoc

    MAJ Havoc Active Member

    Messages:
    3,123
    I parked my Cherokee by the Creek in Chickasaw. Does that count?
     
  16. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

    Messages:
    5,606
    When I lived in Tuscaloosa, I had a Apaloosa that ate grass by the Coosa. Then we moved to Tallapoosa, and the Apaloosa had to eat grass near the Chattahoochie.
     

Share This Page