pray for me

Discussion in 'Medical Advice' started by BIGMAMA, Jul 30, 2009.

  1. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

    Messages:
    10,267
    Halloween's on July 20th now?
     
  2. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    huh...? no
    but if I am pregnant.. I wil not have fun Halloween on October 31 ... due to being pregnant.
     
  3. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

    Messages:
    10,267
    A well-placed, steel-toe, size 13 boot can cure all that. Unless you feel comfy with a coat hanger, vise grips, and a pipe wrench - you'd do best to come by that afternoon, the next few days seem sketchy...
     
  4. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    only if I confirm the baby and it is tarded or down syndromie

    I swear I shall never do the wild thang again. gonna buy a good test tomorrow and retest Friday morning.
     
  5. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

    Messages:
    6,956
    Maybe you should get the old man some extenze so he can have enough time to get it out.
     
  6. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    I wonder if that stuff works... probably not... but what if it did and it doubled out time... I could have a whole 3-4 minutes of sex woohoo
     
  7. Lomotil

    Lomotil Active Member

    Messages:
    10,267
    Are you kidding?!? You'd be best to stretch it out over a series of days. If you're guaranteed 3-4 minutes, You'd best cut it up into chunks. Make 16 pieces of it, so that you can comfortably stretch it out over a month.

    God damn. All kidding aside - you're not really selling the institution of marriage, you know that - right?!?
     
  8. chumwad84

    chumwad84 New Member

    Messages:
    292
  9. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    OK took the test few days ago , positive ... freaking out, called around to about the RU486 pill... stressed, depressed... and WOOOHOOO

    Blood blood blood bloood blooood....

    so - no baby for me... a natural miscarriage... most women have a bunch of these early miscarriages, and never knew they were pregnant. SO no guilt, no baby, no abortion pill...

    well I guess that is the end of my sex days... never again. Nauseous and I can be celibate sisters.

    dont feel bad, or sad, or hungry ... I looked it up.. it was not even a baby yet , just a bunch of cells ...

    and since I did not tell anyone other then the fugly crew and my sister... I figured... we should name it.. "Fugly Fetus"

    and if you would like, I could post pics of it....
     
  10. chumwad84

    chumwad84 New Member

    Messages:
    292
    Awww. A moments silence for little, unloved blobby cell thing. Goodbye, Fugly Fetus. Your time here was short, but you altered the course of humanity (slightly). This thread, for instance helped reduce my boredom for a few minutes. And BIGMAMA is now going to become pure and chaste. For a week or so, anyway. Farewell, FF! Rest in eternal, everlasting peace.
     
  11. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    right now I think its resting in a make shift pad... Im rocking the toilet paper taco right now... I have tampons... but I think.. plugging it up will lengthen the time.

    Took a valium for the cramps... and well I am high

    and no I am really done with sex ... yuckie .
     
  12. chumwad84

    chumwad84 New Member

    Messages:
    292
    Yes. FF needs to be laid to rest quickly and with dignity. Only then can it have peace. Have you decided how you are going to do that? Is there a nice, quiet little corner of the garden where you could bury the TP, perhaps near a bench? Or under a favorite tree? Or maybe you'd rather just toss it in the can before sinking it with a mighty log, like some sort of savage beast?????
     
  13. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    I can mail it to you...

    naa down the toilet like a goldfish... well actually I buried my goldfish- they were huge...

    ya know if I was not such a paranoid freak, I would have never know I was pregnant... I would have thought... huh period...

    I think I do deserve a treat... so the money I would have spent on RU486 I shall donate it to .... Dillard's, in exchange for some new make up and shoes.
     
  14. chumwad84

    chumwad84 New Member

    Messages:
    292

    Ok, but nothing too sexy, remember. You don't want to be tempted back over to the dark side of small, throbbing penises and 2 minute 'whoopsie-fucks', so i've selected something for you which are nice and sedate:
     
  15. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

    Messages:
    10,886
    God. You went to the Dillards website and everything. Damn. I thought you just googled 'sensible shoes'.

    Apparently, these shoes are fucking popular now. You see 'celebs' wearing them. Any man who would fuck a woman who wears them should have the heel ground into their testicles.

     
  16. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
    I have some points to make

    # 1 who the fuck is Chumwad? they just popped out of nowhere and know shit...

    # 2 both of those shoes made me vomit.

    # 3 celebs wear the ugliest shit ever made... and the stupid real people that try to emulate them look retarded.

    When those boots with the fur were popular... I hated seeing all the tards thinking they looked sexy wearing them.

    I realized years ago that many women dress for other women (not in a dyke way) think about it... I see broke ass bitches carrying purses that would cost them like 3 weeks pay... for what... OTHER WOMEN... to me if a man judged me by the namebrand on my purse... he would be a FAG .. a real man could less.
    you could take a set of identical hot twins... put one in a 40$ sun dress... 10$ shoes... put the other in a 2000$ dress, 500$ shoes, and 750$ purse... They will be most attracted to the one smiling and showing off a better figure.

    god damn we can never stay on topic... it went from pregnancy to fashion...
    might as well go to poop...
    on top of not being preggers, I just had the best dump... you know one of those, you wipe... and there is nothing there... like you have a self cleaning butthole... I love those... much better then the "magic marker" wipe jobs... were you keep wiping and the same mark shows up each time...
     
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2009
  17. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

    Messages:
    8,426
    You funny girl

    Naked chicks in fur boots can be very hot. Couldn't give a damn about the purse though.
     
  18. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

    Messages:
    10,886
    I forgot to tell you earlier that I am going to send you a case of maxi pads... no, fuck that, not maxis... sanitary napkins... like the vending machine kind that make you walk with your legs far apart and don't allow you to sit in a chair without leaning to one side.

    Or I could get you some Spishak's.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f46-JS4yNng
     
  19. BIGMAMA

    BIGMAMA New Member

    Messages:
    2,169
  20. chumwad84

    chumwad84 New Member

    Messages:
    292

    Yeah, i'm pretty fuckn amazing, when you think of it really.
     

Share This Page