I have the FLU

Discussion in 'General Mayhem' started by ucicare, Feb 18, 2008.

  1. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    ....and I hate you all.


    That is all.
     
  2. DangerousD

    DangerousD New Member

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    680
    no flu shot?
     
  3. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    Nope. I made the mistake of having my annual physical last Friday. I walked into the Doctors office office feeling fine. While the Doctor is probing my prostate gland with what felt like his fist, he casually tells me that he has seen 15 cases of the Flu already that day.

    I leave the office, and two days later I start running a fever and have chills and all that. I swear I am not going to walk back in a Doctor's office again unless I'm already sick.

    BTW - It's 4:54 AM here, and I can't sleep. Being sick sucks.
     
  4. DangerousD

    DangerousD New Member

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    680
    Well if you caught it there it was probably on the doorknob and then you took your hand and rubbed your face unless someone coughed or sneezed directly in your face. You should have washed your hands. The flu sucks so hard you should just get your flu shot every year.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2008
  5. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    That or the doc used the same glove on you as he did everyone else..........
     
  6. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,886
    It's karma.
     
  7. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    If Karma was real I would you and I would be married right now.

    (You deserve the reward, and I deserve the punishment.)
     
  8. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    They are supposed to use gloves?
     
  9. nolo451

    nolo451 New Member

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    286
    Buy a bunch of little bottles of Purrel. I use it a lot in school when my classes are over, especially since I only have a 15 min lunch break, I cant afford to go to the bathroom to wash my hands, or Ill be late for my next class after I eat. I havent been sick in like 2-2.5 yrs, I think all this stuff I do is helping.
     
  10. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    If I don't feel better soon I'm going to kill myself.

    The following is my last will and testament.

    1. To Schmed, I leave all my size 13 tube socks, and the five tickets I have to the Flogging Molly concert on March 9th.

    2. To Dwaine, my Lithium-Ion powered Sawzall with the built in light, and all my Vietnam surplus body bags.

    3. To Jefe, my collection of A/A chips.

    4. For Nauseus, my Physicians Desk Reference.

    5. Major, you get the digital four track mini disk recorder that I never
    learned how to use, and the key to the back door of your house.

    6. Joe gets my password to the secret New Republican website.

    7. Nursey gets my most prized possession - my 6/0 Penn Senator Saltwater Reel, and ultra stiff graphite rod. I want to die knowing that Nursey will finally have the Stiff Rod she always wanted.

    8. To Dan, I leave a backstage pass to my funeral. That way you won't have to stand in line to kiss my ass.

    9. Reizvolles, I leave you my treadmill. I am sure the "one year after marriage" hip spread has started.

    10. To Checkmate, umm, what do you give a guy that has everything?

    11. To the rest of you - I'm bored now, and the Nyquil is starting to take effect. See you later, maybe.
     
  11. Joeslogic

    Joeslogic Active Member

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    8,426
    Ahve not lost your sense of humor yet, Drink a lot of fluids and drink a half large bottle of nyquil 15 hours later when you wake up you will be fine.... or was that for a fever?
     
  12. JEFE

    JEFE New Member

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    1,135
    Yeah, my doc just uses cologne. He puts a red, silk scarf over the lights too while he performs the 'procedure' and Barry White is always playing in the background. I always thought that was normal.
     
  13. JEFE

    JEFE New Member

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    1,135
    You'll regret it, but you'll probably live. I'm sorry.

    What is an A/A chip? I'm too drunk to Google it right now.
     
  14. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    I really hope that was sarcasm.
     
  15. Dwaine Scum

    Dwaine Scum New Member

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    no it's not. Jeff would drink wineo piss if it got him drunk
     
  16. JEFE

    JEFE New Member

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    1,135
    Wait. What do you hope was sarcasm. Barry's will or the comment about the AA chip?

    I figured it out. AA. I've had that for years. http://www.aaa.com
     
  17. Nauseous

    Nauseous Active Member

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    10,886
    And in a few years, you can look forward to double A, r.p.

    Barry can tell you ALL about it.
     
  18. phatboy

    phatboy New Member

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    6,956
    Barry's not retired, he's retarded. And I think it's great you let him sit at the table with everyone else....
     
  19. ucicare

    ucicare Active Member

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    5,606
    I resemble that remark.

    ...and I left you out of my will on purpose. I mean, heck, what do you give a Bulldog fan that he doesn't already have? You need humility, compassion, and an offensive coordinator. I currently am out of all three.
     
    Last edited: Feb 21, 2008

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