I need help bashing my polish and irish buds!!

Im italian and I am always being bombarded with italian jokes and other shit. I think its funny as hell and I dont get mad but I would like to get even. Does anyone know any good irish and polish jokes that I havent heard allready? I know there are thousands of them so please help.

 

Don't know of any Polish jokes offhand, but what are some of the Italian jokes? I don't think I've ever heard any.

 

Well on a daily basis I get W.O.P yelled at me. There are actually a lot of jokes about italians, let me think.... What is the shortest book ever written?.. Italian War Heros. How do you keep the flies off the bride at an italian wedding?.....Pile shit on the altar. Two italians jump off a building, which one lands first?... Who gives a fuck. What sounds does it make when you get a flat tire?... dego wop wop wop. Some of those actually suck. But I cant think today.

Shelly

 

HI i'm DEEDEE. I'M NEW AT THIS. MY BIGGEST HOBBY IS BOYS!

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You want some? Cum get some!

 

DEE DEE LOOKING FOR LOVE, CUM GET SOME... AND DON'T BE SHY AND KEEP ME WAITING CAUSE I KNOW YOU WANT SOME HOT STUFF, SO CUM ON BIG BOY'S.

 

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by DeeDee:
DEE DEE LOOKING FOR LOVE, CUM GET SOME... AND DON'T BE SHY AND KEEP ME WAITING CAUSE I KNOW YOU WANT SOME HOT STUFF, SO CUM ON BIG BOY'S.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


For some strange reason, I smelt packed fudge when I read your posts....color me wierd or somethin...

 

ok an italian joke...

one day a black misionary, gets injured in the jungle. a group of gorrilas find him and nurse him back to health, and he falls passionatly in love with one female gorrilla.. he decides to bring her home and dresses her in a wedding dress and blonde wig to get her on a plane... the co-piolt walks by the two and makes a face of disgust... the piolt asks him "Hey whats wrong with you?" he replies, "A pretty Italian girl married to a fucking nigger" *rimshot*

 

Ok - a freakin' pollack joke for ya:

There's these 2 Polish dudes about to take the citizen test and the one guy is really worried... So he says to his friend, "I'm really afraid I can't pass this test, man!"

His pal goes "Don't worry! I got it covered. Look, this is what we're gonna do, ok? I got me this here book with all the answers - so, tonight, I'm gonna write 'em in my underwear, so after I go first and pass the test - I'll go into the men's room -leave 'em on top of the terlet - you put 'em on, take the test - no problem!!!!!"

So, okay, his friend agrees... On the day of the test the first guy goes in and sits down, and the test begins.....

Testor: Who is the president on the one dollar bill?
Pollack1: (peek) uh, Washington?
Testor: Correct! How many states in the union?
P1: (peek again) 50!
T: Right! Now, final question - what are the colours of the American flag?
P1: (peek peek again) - um... Red, white, & blue!
T: Congratulations, sir - you are now a US citizen!

So - the guy is worried about his nervous friend and runs off to the men's room and leaves his underwear on the toilet... he signals his friend who is so freaked out - that he runs in puts the underwear on OVER HIS PANTS and runs in to take the test....

Testor: Good morning sir - are you ready for your citizenship test?
Pollack2: uM, I think so.....

T: ok, lets get on with it; Who is the president on the one dollar bill?
P2: (peeking...) Uh... "Hanes"?????
T: (shaking head) ok, let's try this - How many states in the union?
P2: (peeking furiously) Er, 36 to 38?
T: Ok, son - see if you can get this one..
What are the colours of the american flag?? Do you at least know that?
P2: Um, sure! (peeks around a long while, looks up - smiles broadly and says)
YELLOW & BROWN!!!