Constipation

[Nauseous]

Sucks. I'm supposed to have diarrhea, not constipation. I hope to hell my bowels aren't obstructed again. :mad:

Anyway, just venting. I'm off to the hippie store to buy some marsh mallow root and slippery elm.

[BIGMAMA]

I dont trust hippie stuff. If I get stuffed up... I use Correctol... take it at night, wake up shittin at 8am. Its what my parents always used when I was a kid. I remember my mom always running through the house yelling "CORRECTOL " ... still to this day , whenever my sister and I see someone running, we say .."correctol???" I guess my mom used it a lot

So I take it when needed... or eat a can of turnip greens.

I have not been constipated in forever. But when pregnant... I would only crap like 2-3 times a week... I had to take prenatal vitamins that had a stool softener in it.

when my X husband would get constipated - he would just eat at Krystals ...

when people call with constipated dogs... we tell them to feed it canned pumpkin.

[Lomotil]

Go to the pharmacy and ask for their generic Docusate Sodium or Docusate Calcium. They usually keep some behind the counter because docs write scripts for them. The stuff they keep behind the counter is much cheaper than even the "store brand" generics out on the shelves, and you can usually get a hundred for the price of one box of 24...

You'll be crapping in no time! :)

If you can get past the taste, Magnesium Citrate solution works well, too (chill it first to reduce the flavor.)

Trust Lomotil for all your shitty questions... :biggrin:

[Nauseous]

when people call with constipated dogs... we tell them to feed it canned pumpkin.

I was going to do that actually. I figured since it worked for dogs, it should work for me.

[Nauseous]

Go to the pharmacy and ask for their generic Docusate Sodium or Docusate Calcium. They usually keep some behind the counter because docs write scripts for them. The stuff they keep behind the counter is much cheaper than even the "store brand" generics out on the shelves, and you can usually get a hundred for the price of one box of 24...

You'll be crapping in no time! :)

If you can get past the taste, Magnesium Citrate solution works well, too (chill it first to reduce the flavor.)

Trust Lomotil for all your shitty questions... :biggrin:

This wouldn't cause explosive shits, would it?

I seem to go first thing in the AM but not much and then it's just little bits throughout the day and it's frustrating. I would call it constipation. I'm forcing myself to drink more water.

[Nauseous]

I forgot to mention that I am on a low residue diet. I think it might be playing a major part in this. Basically everything I eat has 0 fiber in it.

[ucicare]

I forgot to mention that I am on a low residue diet. I think it might be playing a major part in this. Basically everything I eat has 0 fiber in it.


You have to eat to shit. Simple fact. Eat a whole lot of food, and you will either shit or die.

now shut up.

[Nauseous]

If you don't know what a low residue diet is, you could have just asked...

[BIGMAMA]

You have to eat to shit. Simple fact. Eat a whole lot of food, and you will either shit or die.

now shut up.


wow, someone took a double dose of dickhead pills


low residue - isn't that a low fiber, small meals... to make you poop less? If I remember it is to give your body more time absorb the nutrients... cause your food moves slowly through the body.

so I guess it is normal to be constipated

[Nauseous]

Yeah, I found a website that had a diet that said, "What to eat when you have a partial bowel obstuction" and ever since I got out of the hospital I have been following it. I think it, combined with the iron in the vitamins and the lack of water is causing this problem. I'm trying to drink more water but yuck. It makes me feel sloshy.

So I'm taking probiotics and started on this slippery elm stuff to see what happens.

I fired my gastroenterologist and waiting to get into another one.

Small town living is no good when you need medical care.

[phatboy]

Why dont you do like icenhour and let the hubby hit the hershey highway every now and then to see if he can break up the log jam.......

:)

On a serious note, wouldnt you want fiber to get you going, or are you wanting it to stay in your body longer (the food)? I dont remember what it was, but when my wife was on some meds that did that to her they gave her these little pills that worked pretty quick. But then you'd get dehydrated. I thought water hardened up stool?

[Nauseous]

No, lack of water will make you constipated. Fiber bulks up your stool and you need water to soften it.

Fiber is not good for people with certain diseases of their digestive tract. Like me, fiber is not really good for Crohn's.

Your poop comes out of your small intestine as green liquid and as it travels through your colon, water is absorbed. The longer it stays in your colon, the more water is absorbed and the harder the poop gets.

[BIGMAMA]

Why dont you do like icenhour and let the hubby hit the hershey highway every now and then to see if he can break up the log jam.......


gross "log jam" gross and funny.
and BTW ... my current husband's dingdong could not break up a stuffy nose... he could fuck you in the ass and you would never know it... little dick bastard.

(can you tell I am pissed off at him)

[phatboy]

You hide your anger so well. Maybe you two should go to counseling and resolve your issues, I think Barry would do it for free, as long as you assist with the reach around.

[BIGMAMA]

You hide your anger so well. Maybe you two should go to counseling and resolve your issues, I think Barry would do it for free, as long as you assist with the reach around.


no a lawyer is taking care of it :) its all good, just having a few income questions not being answered... it sucks trying to prove what the self employed makes (when they only accept CASH) ,,, but its on like donkey kong . I made copies of every clients paper this weekend. Lawyers assistant is adding it all up.

ps
I would assist Barry with a reach around... maybe he would not be such a dick.

And Nauseous... once again... I caught your illness. I am having sympathy constipation.... and gas... not farting type gas, but cant fart - gas. uggg painful .

[Nauseous]

That sucks! I hope you are feeling better today.

I've been drinking prune juice today like an old lady. I think I have hemorrhoids now.

It keeps getting better and better. I finally got over the thrush that my antibiotics caused. Thrush. That was something I could have went w/o experiencing in my life.

[BIGMAMA]

My baby had thrush a few months ago. I felt like the worst mom ever. He liked the medicine..and it cleared up quick. Ugg nothing like a yeast infection of the mouth. From what I read it is common for babies...

I did not know you could get from a medication.. or is because your meds weakened your immune system? I know antibiotics can cause the cooter yeast infection.... never thought about the mouth. I think it is the same fungus ... I wonder if someone can get thrush from eating a yeasty cooter. GROSS ...now I have to look that up


constipation ended today... now I have the runs. Nothing ever works normal.. feast or famine

glad you are feeling better

[Nauseous]

I was taking Cipro and Flagyl, but I totally blame Flagyl for the thrush. It kills all of the good bacteria in your mouth so there is nothing to fight off the yeast. It does it downstairs too.

I don't know what my deal is. I feel crampy and poopy today. Maybe the prune juice/apple juice combo worked too well? I dunno. If I decide to ever kill myself, I'm totally shooting myself in the gut. I want to blast my stomach, small and large intestine all over the place.

[phatboy]

I must say that I have learned more in this Topic Specific set of threads than anywhere else on the internet. I have learned all kinds of new things that I never knew about before (wether I wanted to or not).

:)

I hope you both are feeling better. If not I suggest taking some of 'Dr. Phatty's Two Ball Tonic and Root Oil'....

:)

[BIGMAMA]

Thanks... I just had a funny thought .. every time I am around my parents or any old people- all they talk about is medical ailments. Can you imagine if Nauseous and I are friends when we are old ladies. My god we would have so much to talk about.

I already know I am going to bore the shit out of my kids.

[Lomotil]

I can see it now... The two of you, sitting on rocking chairs on a patio somewhere, knitting quilts as you spin yarns back and forth...

[BIGMAMA]

we can change each other's shittie diapers.

[Nauseous]

That sounds like good bonding time.

I kinda hope I'll be dead before I get old. I don't have kids to have to live for so I don't see why I need to stick around.

It's all downhill from here, I'm afraid. :eek:

[BIGMAMA]

That sounds like good bonding time.

I kinda hope I'll be dead before I get old. I don't have kids to have to live for so I don't see why I need to stick around.

It's all downhill from here, I'm afraid. :eek:


STOP!!!

dont say retarded shit like that.

do you want kids?

[Nauseous]

Just feeling sorry for myself. Sorry.

I married a man with a daughter, so I have a step-daughter. I don't see her much. She lives two states away.

I never planned on children. I don't have the maternal instinct and I am neurotic as hell and would probably end up with munchausen syndrome by proxy or I would try to keep them in a bubble. Everyone tells me that I shouldn't have kids because I would be a terrible mother because I am so paranoid. I'm sure I would think everyone was a child molester and their baby food was poisoned, so my kids would have no fun.

I bought some rawhides the other day for my dogs which I hate doing because I think they will get a bowel obstruction, anyway, I bought them and on the way home I noticed that they were made in Taiwan, so I wouldn't give them to them because I don't want to take a chance on them having some toxic shit in them.

I'm going to a therapist Dec. 1st over my paranoia and depression.

I feel like the old guy that lives across the street has one of those "Listen Up" things and listens to everything that goes in at my house. It makes me laugh, but at the same time I secretly think it's true.

Bad thing is, I know I will sugar coat everything that I tell the therapist and they won't realize how bad off I really am.

[phatboy]

If you are going to put the effort in to go to a therapist you should at least be honest. I dont know if there is a cause for depression/anxiety or if it is just a gene trait. They will try to put you on anti-depressants, which will only lead to other issues. I think you need to move somewhere warmer and not so dreary. Arizona would be a nice state for you. Get out of that musty old coal mine air and get some fresh air. That would depress me.

Dont let other people you would be a bad anything. All that negative energy just weighs on you, and after a while you start believing it. I never had a goal, or dream, of getting married and being a dad, but I really underestimated how great being a dad is. Im sure back in my promiscuous days people probably never would have pegged me for the best dad EVAR, I was pretty self centered. Now, all those ole skanks be all jealous cause they see I was more than just a pocket full of ding-a-ling. Seriously, my boy changed my whole life.

:)

[BIGMAMA]

Talk about mom material ...The day I found out I was pregnant with Evan (almost 10 years ago) .. I woke early to get ready for a photo shoot...pissed on the test, and just sat there in shock... I was going to be 1999 April's cover girl of popular fetish magazine, and was supposed to host a fetish ball that night... and was just on the cover of an Atlanta Magazine. I hung out with club kid queens, partied 3-5 times a week. Never was into drugs (unlike all the others) I think I enjoyed watching people get fucked up- so I could indulge in my clepto activities. In other words - I was no Martha Stewart. I had I fully equipped dungeon that took over just about every room - I never ate at my house. Yuk

Me telling people I was pregnant... haha no one believed me. That all thought I was so weird that I did not have sex. Everyone thought the little film nerd I was hanging out with was a fag. Many "club acquaintances" thought I was post op Tranny. My life turned around 93.2% ... No I am not a typical suburb mommy ... never will be..and No matter what - I will never dress like the mommy next door...I dont care if I have 9 kids. Kids change your brain and life... for the better.

As for being paranoid ... every mom is. You get over it. If not... your kids will just make fun of you when they are old enough to... and have some great laughs

Dont sugar coat your shit with the shrink... I over exaggerate my issues ... except for my urge to kill random people - that deserve it ... I sugar coat that one.

You need to relax, you need a vacation --- and escape this package you put yourself in. Just go somewhere - get out and have fun...I bet you are stuck in a rut... a creature of habit - Seriously - wanna go on a weekend adventure? I am due for one (with all the crap goin on here) . Where do you live, and where do you wanna go??? My treat

[Lomotil]

You need to relax, you need a vacation --- and escape this package you put yourself in. Just go somewhere - get out and have fun...I bet you are stuck in a rut... a creature of habit - Seriously - wanna go on a weekend adventure? I am due for one (with all the crap goin on here) . Where do you live, and where do you wanna go???

My treat

I think you meant to say, "A certain pencil-dick, shadow of a man, whom I raised from the ashes and made whom he is today... soon-to-be, ex-husband of mine's treat..." :biggrin: ;)

While we're at it, I could use a new dishwasher.

No, I'm not proposing - I just need a new electrical appliance. :p

[Lomotil]

Bad thing is, I know I will sugar coat everything that I tell the therapist and they won't realize how bad off I really am.

Honestly.

I talk a lot of shit 'round here, but I'm being serious for a change:

Everyone that picked this sentence out and commented on it is absolutely right. It defeats the whole purpose if you don't lay everything out on the table with your shrink.

Unless, of course, you're hiding some bodies or something, in which case I could understand - but to pay someone for help and therapy, without giving them all the info is like... well... Calling tech support and not mentioning what operating system you have.*

*analogy is based on the existence of competent "tech support" - the analogy works great in theory, but I've never met a competent tech support phone operator (and rarely one I can even understand.)

[phatboy]

*analogy is based on the existence of competent "tech support" - the analogy works great in theory, but I've never met a competent tech support phone operator (and rarely one I can even understand.)

Amen

I agree with BigMama, you'all need to road trip, hit up some antique shops. There are some really good one in Tenneessee. The little town my Mom lives in has 3 and everytime we go up we hit em up. Its like whenever someone old dies up there the antique store gets all their stuff.

[Nauseous]

I think you need to move somewhere warmer and not so dreary. Arizona would be a nice state for you. Get out of that musty old coal mine air and get some fresh air. That would depress me.

:)

I hate the heat. I like my town. No coal mining goes on here. I live up on a hill outside city limits where I can see for miles and miles off of my back deck and all I see are trees. It's really beautiful and sometimes I have to remind myself that it's real and not a Bob Ross painting.

I'm depressed because I have this stupid disease that causes pain and fear everyday. I can't get up in the morning and just go out to breakfast like everyone else. I can't really eat anywhere because there are so many things that I can't eat. I'm constantly worried about being in the hospital again. Next time could be surgery and then another surgery and another until I end up with virtually no small intestine and have to have my stomach contents leak out of a pouch on my side. Not to mention the fact that I could literally get tunnels (fistulas) from my anus to my vag and end up one day shitting out of my vag. These are all complications that I worry about on a daily basis. And the medicines are just as bad. Chemotherapy doesn't sound like a good time. Six hour infusions of Remicaide made with mouse protein (being a vegetarian for 16 years, that doesn't sit well with me) and shots and steroids that all cause crazy side effects that range from diabetes to cancer. So I'm reeling with the what ifs? and combined with the paranoia that I already have about everything you can think of, I'm pretty messed up in my head.

A hypochondriac with GAD should never get an incurable disease. It consumes your life.

My problem is going to be the ability to verbalize this stuff to a complete stranger.

[Nauseous]

Dont sugar coat your shit with the shrink... I over exaggerate my issues ... except for my urge to kill random people - that deserve it ... I sugar coat that one.

You need to relax, you need a vacation --- and escape this package you put yourself in. Just go somewhere - get out and have fun...I bet you are stuck in a rut... a creature of habit - Seriously - wanna go on a weekend adventure? I am due for one (with all the crap goin on here) . Where do you live, and where do you wanna go??? My treat

One shrink I went to told me that I might be suffering from the beginning of schizophrenia and another told me that I had cyclothymia. Those are two totally different disorders. I know I am neither, so I don't have a lot of faith in those people. I am actually going to a therapist first I guess and then if they think I need meds, I will go to the drug dealer.. I mean shrink. (same difference)

I'd like to have fun and go somewhere. But I never know how sick I will be from one day to the next. And then there is the paranoia of leaving home. The only time I spent overnight away from my house in 7 years was in the hospital and it killed me inside. The worst part was being away from my dogs. I don't like to leave them alone because I'm always worried that the house is going to catch on fire or someone is going to break in and shoot them. I literally get panicked when I get about 10 miles from home. Hell, I get scared when I let them out that someone is going to shoot them in the backyard and I am always thinking my neighbors are throwing things over the fence with poison in it.

My own husband doesn't like to be around me because of the constant obsessing.

Heh... I also have OCD too. A little. I'm a weirdo about public places and germs. I have to shower as soon as I get home from being out in the public and change clothes. The thought of someone's cough germs or stink molecules being on me makes me want to vomit.

But at least I'm honest about it. I don't hide these things from people I know, but to tell some random stranger that if shakes my hand, I am dying inside and I feel like sitting in the chair is germing me up with stink from people who don't wash themselves like I do is going to be a little tough.

[Lomotil]

My problem is going to be the ability to verbalize this stuff to a complete stranger.

Give us their name... We'll forward a link to this thread. :)

Might not be a bad idea..?

[Nauseous]

I don't want them reading all of my personal stuff.

I did think about writing it down. I thought it would be better for my husband to go with me because he can really bust out the shit. I hate hearing him list all of the shit that's wrong with me. :mad:

[BIGMAMA]

type it all out... hand them paper... you just typed out for us. Cut and paste.

I wish I lived near you- I would cheer you up. that is one thing I am good at- not so good at it on a keyboard.

I dont think there is a pill that will cure all these mental issues . Not unless it makes you so high and fucked up - you dont care about anything.

And sugar coating it with the therapist will not help either.

[Nauseous]

I think we'd actually get along if we lived close. I'm not a big fan of females (which is why I'm not a good fruit fly), but you're different.

Actually, the women that post here are pretty cool. Just few and far between.

[BIGMAMA]

same here... women are weird

most of my friends are guys... in the old days they were fags, now all straight guys.

[Nauseous]

Gay guys have all of the qualities that I hate in women. They are bitchy, mean, snobby and back stabby.

[Nauseous]

I have one gay friend and he annoys the ever-loving shit out of me. He's the one of the most self-centered people I have ever met. I have known some cool gay guys, but I didn't know them well. The ones I have got to know better, I didn't care for because they were like women x 10.

[Homewrecker]

I just pinched a loaf, butt I haven't wiped yet.

[Lomotil]

I just pinched a loaf, butt I haven't wiped yet.

No shit? That's remarkable. Do you have pics?

[Nauseous]

I had a nice turd this morning and I wanted to take a picture of it. I was sad when I flushed it down the toilet. It was a "big girl" turd and I was proud. I'm going to tell my gastroenterologist about it today.

[BIGMAMA]

since we all sharing... I had diarrhea Friday, and shit in my pants as I left the grocery store. ( I was loading the groceries in the car) So I had to drive all the way home (about 15 min) with about 2 tablespoons of shit in my pants.

Today I doodooed , and it was foamy... looked like chocolate froth... and floated. And for some reason smelled like dog doodoo.

I wish I had a normal turd system.

[Nauseous]

I'd say part of it is probably your nerves.

Foamy, floating shit usually means you are not absorbing fat properly.

I call it apple fritters shit. I've had shit that looks like apple fritters floating in oil.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2407/2252909029_356031be04.jpg?v=0

[BIGMAMA]

good, I don't want to absorb fat.

Back years ago a Doc gave me a small sample bottle of Xenycal (sp) anyway, it stopped fat absorption. It causes grease to leak out of your butt. I was sitting on the front porch stairs...and when I got up there was a puddle of oily poo. I never felt it, it just oozed out. I got the hose to rinse it... but it had soaked into the wood, and for over 6 months after that, when it would rain...it would bead up in that spot. It weather proofed that 6x9 inch spot.

I never took it again, but my X husband tried it... and leaked greasy shit all over the sofa.

and it took forever to wipe your ass... it was so oily. We even made jokes about needing some Dawn dish soap... to cut the grease.

I gave the remaining pills to my friend...and she ruined her seats in her new car....was driving to work, and had to call in that day from the parking lot.

Bad drug...

[Nauseous]

That made me laugh. Especially about the weather proofing. I always thought smeg should be used as a car wax. Anyway... Do they still make those chips with that stuff... what was it called? Olestra? The bag warned you of anal leakage.

I took Zelnorm before they yanked it off the market for causing strokes and it made me shit river water for two hours straight.

[phatboy]

Olean. That was the stuff they put in the chips and all.

"Warning: May cause anal leakage"

[Nauseous]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olestra

Same difference

I used to eat those Lays Wow! I think that's what they were called and I didn't have any leakage. They were actually pretty good chips.

[Nauseous]

This Product Contains Olestra. Olestra may cause abdominal cramping and loose stools (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feces). Olestra inhibits the absorption of some vitamins and other nutrients. Vitamins A, D, E, and K have been added.

Damn, that's what Crohn's and Celiac Disease do.

[BIGMAMA]

I ate those chips... and trust me, It was nothing like the Xenical. I wish I could get some more of it... put it in people's food that piss me off. Watch them walk around with warm oily shit in their pants.

[Lomotil]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olestra

Same difference

I used to eat those Lays Wow! I think that's what they were called and I didn't have any leakage. They were actually pretty good chips.

I tried those... they did give me the mad Hershey Squirts... But even living with that, I could never get over that strange oily film that it left in my upper mouth...

Like I've always said, people... Eat real shit. Our bodies are honed to metabolize REAL butter, etc...

[MAJ Havoc]

good, I don't want to absorb fat.

Back years ago a Doc gave me a small sample bottle of Xenycal (sp) ..

You can buy Alli at Wal-Mart. Same thing. Wear dark clothes and an adult diaper. Or at least come buy my house and rub up on my fence if you use it. It could stand some weather-proofing.

[Nauseous]

Some fat free stuff isn't bad. Cool Whip is good fat free and there is some kind of yogurt I ate that is fat free and good.

I think calories are what you want to watch out for.

I've been eating pumpkin pie everyday and everyday my stool has been decent, so I am going to eat pumpkin pie everyday for the rest of my life. That and these probiotics I am taking. My stomach still bothers me, but I'm functioning better. Of course, I'll be sick now that I wrote all of that.

[Nauseous]

Yeah, today I feel like crap. So much for that theory.

[BIGMAMA]

I dont think anyone should eat the same thing for a few days. A few months ago I got on a clementine (sp) kick - those little oranges .... That was all I ate for 3 days- I ate a whole box from Sam's Club by myself, then went to buy another- and finished 1/2 of that box. I got the quirts and my butthole was on fire, and I felt like crap. Damn those little things are good.

[phatboy]

I dont think anyone should eat the same thing for a few days. A few months ago I got on a clementine (sp) kick - those little oranges .... That was all I ate for 3 days- I ate a whole box from Sam's Club by myself, then went to buy another- and finished 1/2 of that box. I got the quirts and my butthole was on fire, and I felt like crap. Damn those little things are good.

Maybe you shouldnt eat the peels.

[Nauseous]

That's pure acid. Oranges rip me up.

[beauzho]

wow, someone took a double dose of dickhead pills


low residue - isn't that a low fiber, small meals... to make you poop less? If I remember it is to give your body more time absorb the nutrients... cause your food moves slowly through the body.

so I guess it is normal to be constipated

Ho mu-thu-fuk-u

We all be dick heads on this bus